Friday night in DJ King’s condo

By Marcus Pettersson

DJ KingHey Waggy! Waggy, wake up!

Steve WagnerWhat is it? Calm down, Kinger, calm down! What's the matter?

DJ KingHe did it again. It's too much, I can't take it anymore!

Steve WagnerWho did what?

DJ KingThe kid! He spoke in that wierd language again.

Steve WagnerWhat are you talking about? Oh, you mean David? He came over again?

DJ KingYea. He spoke France to me.

Steve WagnerFrench.

Deeeeeejaaaaayyy!What?

Steve WagnerIt's called French. France is a country.

DJ KingThat's what I said â€" France.

Steve WagnerSure, but... nevermind. So what if he spoke... France?

DJ KingIt's freakin' me out, man! It's so pretty and smooth sounding... And... and he kicked the crap out of me on that videogame thing! You know the black thingy by the TV... with the pressing of the buttons...

Young Mr Wagner...the pressing of the buttons? What the hell are you talking about? How many times do I have to tell you? It's called a Playstation!

DJ KingExactly â€" that thing! I didn't have a chance! He's so fast with his fingers, man. You shoulda seen 'im, it was almost as creepy as when he did that thing with the stickhandling and the pucks in practice the other day! We have to get him out of here, I don't feel good about this, Waggy, he eats his meat bloody fer God's sake, and he keeps whispering that he'll take my spot on the roster soon. Plus, he drinks wine! I've been thinking about telling Coach Andy about that, Waggy. I mean, he's only nineteen! You're not allowed to drink when you're nineteen! You think I should tell him? I'm telling!

Steve WagnerCalm down, Kinger, calm down!

David PerronUn homme seul est toujours en mauvaise compagnie.

DJ KingAaaah!

Steve WagnerHey, Dave. Have you been messing with Kinger again?

David PerronLe monde est fait avec des astres et des hommes.

Steve WagnerWell, you know how he gets. You think you could let him win a game sometime? He thinks you're being mean.

David PerronSi j'eusse été méchant comme tant d'autres, je serais heureux comme eux.

Steve WagnerAnd please, try to speak English around Kinger. He's afraid of strange stuff, including languages.

What afraid?! I spik England very good!

Steve WagnerNo. It's called Engli... ah, screw this, I'm going back to bed! EJ gets to live with Chopper and I'm stuck in this madhouse!

David PerronLa bouche sourit mal quand les yeux sont en pleurs.

DJ KingNooooooo!

Concept stolen from inspired by Brad Lee. Thanks, Brad.

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