Top 11 things Eric Brewer hasn’t figured out

12. Being better than Christian Backman doesn’t count for much.

13. Even if you imagine the opposing players naked, they will still get a scoring chance when you put the puck on their tape.

14. Not being as good as Chris Pronger is acceptible. Not being as good as Alexander Khavanov is not.

15. @4.25 million a year you are expected to break 30pt.s or be like jay mckee and keep pucks from going in the net.

16. when you screw up no one’s going to feel sorry for you

17. you want fan support give us some reasons why and we’ll support you in bad times(see lee stempniak; who btw took less than he could have got on the free market for real)

18. i would have taken the first rounder and prospects offered for you if there were any truth to that rumor

19. now that wagner’s in peoria that makes at least four defensemen in the minors better than you so start playing accordingly

20. “The Robot” is a wierd danceform, not an effective playing style.

21. Did we mention that the Blues were supposedly offered a first-round pick and prospects in exchange for you?

22. You’ve got to be better than just “good enough” when you’re the primary return in a trade for an icon. It took Pronger some time to figure that out, too…

23. “What’s the fascination with provel cheese in this town?”

24. why do the fans want to know where i went to highschool and think Pronger wore number farty four?

24A. That’s “farty-far.”

25. What’s with the ’tard waving the towel from the cheap seats.

anybody want a ticket for tonight’s game? 13 rows behind the blues’ goal. just let me know.

26. How to change directions on the ice in skates.

27. Having only “one giveaway” per game doesn’t cut it for a top-two defenseman.

28. Bryce Salvador can’t be everywhere covering his ass.

28A. Winding up your slap shot as fast as a rusty gate in a 2 mph breeze does not increase the chance that the shot will get through.