Two Blues "Personalities" Make Rankings

by Brad Lee on Jan 24, 2008 10:29 AM CST

I can't believe we're using this picture

By Brad Lee

Our friends over at St. Louis Sports Magazine this week ranked their top five most annoying people who hang on the coat tails of our town's professional sports teams. The Blues sport two of the five on the list. Yippee!

5.) Horn Man

A lesser known entity than his counterparts, the Horn Man's main job description is to blow the unofficial airhorn at Blues games in an attempt to get the crowd into a "Let's Go Blues" chant.Â As we noted at the game on Saturday, Horn Man has the unique ability to emote with his instrument.Â

We heard some horns of disappointment after the Predators scored, some horns of frustration when the Blues struggled on the power play and horns of jubilation shortly after a goal by the home team.Â Despite his potential affect on the home crowd, Horn Man isn't nearly astute enough at self promotion to top a list full of heavyweights like this.

That lastÂ point is the most importan thing about theÂ Horn Guy (Man--whatever): we don't know who he is, we don't know what he looks like or his real name. There aren't pictures of him at a wedding standing on a chair waving a towel around trying to make the event more about him and not the bride and groom (true story). We think there's probably more than one guy with a horn. To us, this guy is a fan, he wanst to help the atmosphere in the DrinkScotch Center and he's doing his part. It was depressing that in the games after the lockout when the arena was half dead, there were no horns to get people going. We're kind of glad heÂ is back. We only find him annoying if the Blues are losing big time and he's still blowing.

3.) Towel Guy

During Saturday's game versus Nashville, shortly after the Blues scored their second goal to make the score 5-2, our eyes turned to Towel Guy's section.Â

In a potentially disastrous turn of events, the cotton candy man had set up camp in TG's path.Â Â Wielding the power that comes with his role, Towel Guy promptly rushed the vendor up the stairs to clear his way to the rail so that he could stand and wave his towel like a madman. NeverÂ get in the way of a true performer when he's about to go on stage.Â

We're predicting that Towel Guy is about 20 home games away from having a fight to the death with Louie, the new team mascot.Â That's his territory, baby.Â Â

First of all, let's set the record straight, it's Towel Boy. That's non-negotiable. Second, we couldn't agree more. This attention whore signs his towels before he throws them. He has a flashing strobe light on him so fans know where to look after a goal. He's got his own afroed cartoon on the scoreboard.Â WeÂ would probably root forÂ a Towely-Louie deathmatch if both went hurtling over the railing, but then all of us parents would have to explain to our kids why two of their favorite things at Blues games were laying inÂ a bloody heap two sections away from us. And no one wants to do that.

I must admit, fellas at St. Louis Sports Magazine, I was disappointed there was no honorable mention for Cotton Eyed Joe Guy, Banging On The Glass Like A Caged Monkey Guy (really a genre of fan and not an individual) and the man with the Mega Mullet in Section 101 (who we are a fan of but he needs some publicity anyway for his dedication to the mullet). And thanks for leaving Red Berenson Cowboy from 306 out of this because he probably would kick our ass if he ended up on your list.

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Comments

The horn people (there are sometimes 3 at games) are fine, and I see no difference between horn-led cheers and organ-led ones. I like having both.

Towel boy I’m less enthusiastic about. It’s kinda fun when you get up above 3 goals and the Blues are winning, but seems goofy for the first goal or when down by 4. Plus, his timing is terrible: most of the time he starts his thing at the same time the opposing team is dangerously attacking, and I’ve seen the other team score while he’s been “swingin’ and flingin’”. Nice. Thought you were supposed to wait for a break in the play before leaving your seat?

by Mr. Particle on Jan 24, 2008 12:43 PM CST reply actions

The horn is a good thing because it is fan led. When it’s fans serving to get other fans pumped up, I don’t think it gets any better. Of course, when there are 3,259,075,097 people with bugles, horns, airhorns, or a mouth loud enough to do the horn noise, it gets old. Also, when it’s done 5 times in a row, it gets old. Down by 4 goals? Sit down, don’t do it, that’s old.

Agreed on all parts on Towelhead.

Bit of an aside, but I just got back from the pharmacy on the corner of 141 and Olive. As I’m getting rung up for my stuff, who the hell should walk in but Larry Pleau. Got his take on the Vancouver game (“should’ve won it in 60”) before I left. Certainly not something you see everyday.

by Poor College Student on Jan 24, 2008 1:03 PM CST reply actions

If towel-boy was third something has me confused. What were the other members on the list (remember I’m in NC and it’s not worth a 1200 mile round trip)?? If anybody could let me know I’d appreciate it!!!

by Johnny Stats on Jan 24, 2008 1:36 PM CST reply actions

I got a fee-vuh and the prescription is more horn and less towel.

by Answer Man on Jan 24, 2008 2:06 PM CST reply actions

Don’t have much of a problem with the Towel Guy, although I have seen what you’re talking about when the other team scores and he’s tossing his terry-cloth signature into the stands. I like the horn people myself, expecially when there’s a weak horn trying to get something going and another horn chimes in.

I saw Willem Dafoe several weeks ago at the Uncle Bill’s on Kingshighway after an away game win the night before. I didn’t say anything but I was wearing my “Whatever it takes” shirt and he knew that I knew that he was one badass mo’fo.

by Guinea Pig on Jan 24, 2008 2:21 PM CST reply actions

Hey Johnny Stats, click on the link in the story. It goes to the list, which has Sign Guy from Busch Stadium as No. 1.

by Brad Lee on Jan 24, 2008 2:43 PM CST reply actions

Ok, I’ve got the makings of a sinister plan I think. It’s not completely fleshed out, but here it is:

Game Time (or some other local company that can be used as a "front") approaches the Blues to sponsor the “home team goal announcement and celebration”. Then whenever the Blues score, you hear “and now the Game Time goal announcement… scoring for the Blues, his 1st career goal, #28, Matt Walker… etc.”.

Now the cool part. The Game Time theme song starts playing just after the announcement, which is when Towel Boy does his thing… and the song is… Cotton Eyed Joe. Now the CEJ guy gets up, TB doesn’t know what to do, and we all sit back and watch it unfold.

Eventually TB gives up, kills CEJG, or something equally entertaining happens. I’m guessing CEJG can’t do that dance more than once or twice a night anyway, so he probably keels over.

Both annoyances taken care of.

There are only 2 problems: 1) it costs money 2) it makes us hear the CEJ song a lot. But at least we’ll never have to hear it during a shootout.

by Mr. Particle on Jan 24, 2008 3:20 PM CST reply actions

Thanks…..I didn’t notice that earlier. I’ve had a rough day after last night, and I didn’t know the mag had a website.

by Johnny Stats on Jan 24, 2008 3:48 PM CST reply actions

Then what should the GT Theme Song be?

A couple of Suggestions:

1. China Grove by the Doobie Brothers
2. Uprising Nation by Sick of it All
3. Ghoul’s Night Out by the Misfits

by Answer Man on Jan 24, 2008 4:15 PM CST reply actions

im thinking blues games need more cowbell

by Childhood Trauma on Jan 24, 2008 5:54 PM CST reply actions

and obviously the gt theme song would be one toke over the line.

by Childhood Trauma on Jan 24, 2008 5:54 PM CST reply actions

Murray was at Uncle Bills on Kingshighway??
that’s my neighborhood!

by Dooks on Jan 24, 2008 7:12 PM CST reply actions

I got 2 problems with “horn guy”

1) to air-horn guy in particular, fuck off. you’re TOO loud, and extra annoying.

2) to the horn guy who does the reeeeeaaaaalllllllyyy ssssllloooooooowww pom-pom-pom at the end, quit it. it’s SO annoying that it pisses me off.

by Dooks on Jan 24, 2008 9:06 PM CST reply actions

Is that wedding thing true? That TB actually stood up at a wedding, waving his ridiculous towels around? It can’t be true. Any bride with a tiny fleck of self esteem would strangle him right then and there…

My God.

by Marcus Pettersson on Jan 25, 2008 1:12 AM CST reply actions