Blues at Sharks - Third (and final) Period- Thank God
By Chris Gift

Pierre Turegon vs. Tony Hrkac
Okay, Boyes and Red Wings Fans, we're not really sure why everything is centered, but we're just going to go with it. At least the site will be less likely to tip over in the event of a sharp turn.
The voiceover just said "Blues, Canadiens, Tuesday on FSN Midwest." Please, don't remind me.
16:29- The Blues play in Anaheim tomorrow night. They go from Silicon Valley (where silicon is used to make your computer better) to the other Silicon Valley (where girls with silicon in them end up making your computer slower from downloading their pictures)
14:59- Every time I hear "McLaren" I think I'm watching a Formula One race.
14:33- I beleive in WordPress Code #1. Screw up when the new guy is posting just to piss him off.
13:42- This just in: Brad Lee has drafted Wally Pipp
Commercial- With all those potential side effects- backache, nausea, bad credit.. is getting a stiffy off of Cialis really worth it?
12:37- Johnson has played 15 minutes in two periods. Somebody's girlfriend can't wait to congratulate him.
12:00- Can't we call that guy "rivet" a time or two?
11:17- KGB TV just said we can't fault Toivonen at all on any of the goals? Who are we supposed to blame, for Christ's sake? Theo Huxtable?
9:55- Couldn't Cialis ask if we have "foundation problems" like McLaughlin just did?
9:55 (part 2)- Federko managed to say "Whatever it takes." And mention a kitchen sink in the same sentence. Screw it, I'm going to feed Snoopy.
9:08- This is the part where I wish Chase was on TV, he'd tell us how he really feels, and instead of sugar coating everything, he'd say that the team is pissy about playing this shitty lately too.
8:12- That sure looked like a Shark playing with a broken stick, didn't it?
7:33- A wise(ass) editor once said earlier this season that the Blues look like a bunch of players trying to win with individual plays, not win as a team. I see a good deal of that tonight.
7:03- After watching this game, and listening to this commentary, sometimes I...well, I was going to go for a Helen Keller joke here, but I thought better of it.
5:31 left in regulation- Latendresse may be the exception to the Frogs aren't tough rule. I'd take him over most of the Blues' forwards.
Commercial- Why doesn't the guy in the Acuvue commercial give Grandpa Cialis his contacts so he can shove that football in the tire swing without having three of his fingers fall off and his nuts getting shoved in a waffle iron?
4:37- My bologna has a first name, its O-S-C-A-R...four more minutes until I go to the liquor cabinet and burn my esophagus with something strong straight out of the bottle. My last comment to Gallagher before the game was "I hope this doesn't end up like the Calgary game did..." Well, so much for that.
2:20- McDonald and McLaren battle for the puck, stop in mid battle, ask what town in Ireland each other's relatives are from have a pint, sing Danny Boy, then beat the hell out of a complete stranger for looking at somebody's sister the wrong way.
1:10- Seriously, just keep the puck behind your net for another minute and kill the clock.
0:31- If I could have two wishes, it would be for a backup goaltender, and that the Blues realize how terrible John and Bernie are and get either Darren Pang or Joe Micheletti to do color.
Its over. Amen.
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Comments
Ahhhh good to be back and happy to see we’re still in this one
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:20 PM CDT reply actions
I looked up Valeri’s brother during the break and found this bizarro section on Wikipedia about Pavel’s various lawsuits:
In 2001 a Moscow based newspaper called the eXile published an article claiming Bure broke up with Anna Kournikova after discovering she had two vaginas.3 . Bure successfully sued the eXile under Russian libel law for 500,000 rubles (about US$20,000) in damages.2. The eXile claimed that the original article was a parody and suggested Pavel Bure’s influential status may have compromised the judgment.3
In 2005, Bure again launched another Kournikova related lawsuit, this time against perfume chain Arbat Prestige for defamation. Bure seeks 300,000,000 rubles in damages.4
In August, 2007, a Russian court awarded Bure 67,000 rubles (Cdn $2,750) in a lawsuit he filed against British Airways after being forced to leave a plane. The pilot suspected Bure was a “soccer hooligan”, and would not take off until Bure was escorted off the plane.5
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:21 PM CDT reply actions
I’d say “that reminds me of the Blues,” but I know they have more than two vaginas on the team.
by Chris Gift on Mar 14, 2008 11:23 PM CDT reply actions
Loved the pic! They sell those on eBay?
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:23 PM CDT reply actions
Dear Anna Kournikova’s Two Vaginas,
How YOU doin’?
Regards,
Me
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:24 PM CDT reply actions
That Big Save of the Game was awful. He was waaay out of position and lucky that wasn’t a goal.
by stlchapman on Mar 14, 2008 11:25 PM CDT reply actions
Found it on google by typing in Glass Joe. Also found a site called “hottieswithdouchebags.com” that is a riot.
by Chris Gift on Mar 14, 2008 11:26 PM CDT reply actions
Chris Gift Says:
March 14th, 2008 at 10:26 pm
Found it on google by typing in Glass Joe. Also found a site called "hottieswithdouchebags.com" that is a riot.
—————————————————-
That is funny shit.
by stlchapman on Mar 14, 2008 11:26 PM CDT reply actions
At least McLaren didn’t give Perron the high elbow like he did when he tried to end Richard Zednik’s career in the playoffs a few years ago (I’m sure Pierre was one of the angry masses burning McLaren in effigy after that one).
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:30 PM CDT reply actions
That was a long time ago, before the skate on the neck thing…
it was a clean check, even if Perron was gasping for air.
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:32 PM CDT reply actions
St. Louis could use some cialis…to get their scoring numbers up!!!
thank you, thank you. Be here all week, try the veal.
by Poor College Student on Mar 14, 2008 11:32 PM CDT reply actions
This shit needs to end, I gotta get a beer.
by stlchapman on Mar 14, 2008 11:33 PM CDT reply actions
They’re saving their goals for tuesday the 18th at Bell Centre… 21273 will freak out if Blues beat Habs!!!
Could happen.
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:33 PM CDT reply actions
Did I just see an ad for FSN Kansas City?
How are you going to fill 24 hours of airtime?
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:33 PM CDT reply actions
My god, but the San Jose radio crew is a patronizing bunch. The last hour has been nothing but “Oh the Blues!!! They try so hard!! Isn’t that adorable????”
The shame……the shame…..
by Rich Horton on Mar 14, 2008 11:33 PM CDT reply actions
Give’em one more goal, they’ll save face.
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:33 PM CDT reply actions
Im gonna need Cialis after this game. btw the commercial was filmed in Jeffco cause we all have bathtubs in our yards out here
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:34 PM CDT reply actions
yes, he can do this, people just need to give him a chance
by matt on Mar 14, 2008 11:36 PM CDT reply actions
I am Milo and i got it pointed in the right direction, dont want it stinging the eyes
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:36 PM CDT reply actions
“Im gonna need Cialis after this game. btw the commercial was filmed in Jeffco cause we all have bathtubs in our yards out here”
I dont buy it. They looked more like the “software engineer” type, as opposed to the “running the econolodge” type.
Yes, yes, I’m doomed for pc hell.
by Rich Horton on Mar 14, 2008 11:36 PM CDT reply actions
John sez; “When you look at the first four goals, you can’t fault Toivonen at all.”
WTF is the color of the sky in his world?
by Milo on Mar 14, 2008 11:36 PM CDT reply actions
he got a chance here, P-town and even alaska and the intuits are much more forgiving
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:37 PM CDT reply actions
jeffco is where those folks go to get in touch with their green side
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:37 PM CDT reply actions
Hey, Priceline just put me into the Sheraton in Clayton. Any decent place in Clayton to drown my sorrows tomorrow night?
by Rich Horton on Mar 14, 2008 11:40 PM CDT reply actions
—————-
Mingha Says: March 14th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
jeffco is where those teeth go to get in touch with their green side
—————-
FTFY
by Milo on Mar 14, 2008 11:40 PM CDT reply actions
At least you don’t listen to Pierre and Yvon at RDS.CA!!!
People over here hate them!!!
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:41 PM CDT reply actions
The code doesn’t care if you’re getting mauled in a corner.
Violence could be the answer at this point.
by Poor College Student on Mar 14, 2008 11:44 PM CDT reply actions
There is definitely a you write the comedy pic in that last little scrum
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:44 PM CDT reply actions
Nevermind, French people act like they are going to fight then back down. For shame.
by IrishBlue on Mar 14, 2008 11:44 PM CDT reply actions
That Shark with the broken stick must have missed the cialis commercial.
There’s help, brother! You just gott put up with nausea, a backache a 4-hour long boner and having to bathe outside from now on.
At least you’ll be able to hurl footballs through a tire swing like a fucking pro!
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:44 PM CDT reply actions
- IrishBlue Says:
March 14th, 2008 at 10:44 pm
French people do fight!
Notice he looked for an American
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:45 PM CDT reply actions
Watch for Guillaume Latendresse next tuesday!!!
2 weeks ago, in Buffalo, 2 of 3 punches hit Sabres D-man Pratt right on, knocking him down!!
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:45 PM CDT reply actions
“At least you’ll be able to hurl footballs through a tire swing like a fucking pro!”
Just the same as everyone with herpes and the ability to go rock climbing.
by Poor College Student on Mar 14, 2008 11:45 PM CDT reply actions
Dude, nothing fixes herpes like a little rock climbing. Frsh air KILLS herpes.
Or whatever.
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:47 PM CDT reply actions
Swimming while the red-headed step cousin is in for a visit anyone?
by Milo on Mar 14, 2008 11:47 PM CDT reply actions
Columbus and Atlanta lost for those on pick watch
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:49 PM CDT reply actions
My Johnson is so big it got called for high sticking and drew blood.
by Poor College Student on Mar 14, 2008 11:49 PM CDT reply actions
Ooooooops … Johnson is out of the box. It happens sometimes.
by Milo on Mar 14, 2008 11:51 PM CDT reply actions
the Big Hit sucks!
Should have been the hit at the end of the period when the plexi came off!
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:53 PM CDT reply actions
Dear Keith Tkachuk,
Thanks for showing up tonight, you crotchfruit.
Sarcastically yours,
You Teammates
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:54 PM CDT reply actions
That’s all folks!!!
If NHL Network shows tomorrow’s game I might pop by.
Good night! Give my regards to Benoist for me!
by Pierre Chastenais on Mar 14, 2008 11:55 PM CDT reply actions
Think we should just stick with the Johnson jokes
by Mingha on Mar 14, 2008 11:56 PM CDT reply actions
I will pay Michelleti’s airfare and limo ride to wherever the next game is.
Double for Ken Wilson.
by Poor College Student on Mar 14, 2008 11:56 PM CDT reply actions
Predictions about Gift right now:
1. glazed in sweat.
2. eating barbeque sauce like it’s actual food.
3. ready for a beer bigger than his own head.
by gallagher on Mar 14, 2008 11:58 PM CDT reply actions
specially cause Wilson doesnt stare at Michelleti like he wants his man chowder all over his face
by Mingha on Mar 15, 2008 12:00 AM CDT reply actions
just flipped on Nat. Geo channel for a bigfoot show…I just love big hairy monsters
by Mingha on Mar 15, 2008 12:04 AM CDT reply actions
Gift: Well done.
I’m seriously considering betting next semester’s tuition on a loss tomorrow.
by Poor College Student on Mar 15, 2008 12:04 AM CDT reply actions
I have two Cubs. Shit.
Hey Gifty, nice work. The kids (Poor College Student may be chipping in with Chia afterall) have their work cut out for them to live up to this.
Hopefully they’ll start drinking around noon.
by Brad Lee on Mar 15, 2008 12:05 AM CDT reply actions
Nice work everyone. Everyone who stuck around made this game actually watchable.
Especially you, Gifter. Good job in a losing effort. You’re like the David Backes of the site tonight.
by gallagher on Mar 15, 2008 12:08 AM CDT reply actions
Im out everyone enjoy their evening, again great job Gift and good luck with those cubbies BL
by Mingha on Mar 15, 2008 12:09 AM CDT reply actions
Is she twice as irrational as most women then?
by all blues on Mar 15, 2008 12:42 PM CDT reply actions
my favorite part last night (and remember i missed the first period, so we won in my world!
federko saying how great ears was playing :)
i do now think, especially with recent media attacks, that murray and or some of his staff will almost have to be given the boot this off-season.
i expect some sort of jd vote of confidence followed by off season shake up. kinda of a shame, but the pp is certainly flawed, and not merely in execution, again our power play bites so bloody hard there is NO reason to put a non d on the point and watch them habitually get taken to school by the other side.
by Childhood Trauma on Mar 15, 2008 3:17 PM CDT reply actions

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