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Things I learned at the Blackhawks game last night from other fans

-Apparently Chicago has a very accepting front office as they seem to have an awfully high number of homosexuals playing for their team

-In the time since Joel Quennville left St. Louis, he has done unspeakable acts to children

-All it takes to score on a power play is to constantly shoot the puck even if someone is in front of you (apparantly time/space rips and the puck will phase through defenders)

-The economic crisis must be hitting Chicago hard as I was told many of their fans are unemployed and have had to resort to giving fellatio and performing acts of sodomy for money

-All of the Blues current troubles can be solved by Cam Janssen playing more

-Patrick Kane's parents attempted to abort him as a child but he survived

-Jonathon Toews was apparantly born a mutated flipper baby

-The Blues have lost the last couple games before last night because they didn't finish their checks

-All children who are Blackhawks fans apparantly live with abusive parents in trailer homes

-The NHL does not discriminate against the blind as they employ several blind persons to officiate their games

-Bill Wirtz is a meth addict who acquired the team through a deal with satan which causes him to now have no soul

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