Blues Pre-Game Inspirational Speeches

With just nine games left on the schedule for the St. Louis Blues, we've asked a few folks to come in and give the team some inspiration. And as a special treat, we'll let you inside the dressing room to hear the words for yourself. Before tonight's game against the Vancouver Canucks, we've arranged for a professional motivational speaker.

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Introducting Matt Foley.

Hello there. My name is Matt Foley. I am a motivational speaker. As your coach probably told you, I'm here to make sure you guys don't screw up tonight. First of all, you should know a little bit about me.

I am 35 years old, I am thrice divorced...and I live in a van down by the River Des Peres. Now you may be asking yourself why a guy who looks like me is talking to a bunch of guys who look like you. Shut your pie holes for a minute and I'll tell you why.

If you don't win tonight against the Vancouver Canucks, your whole season could amount to JACK SQUAT! You're two points out of the playoffs right now. La-de-frickin'-dah! Let's have a party for being close to eighth place. I'll bring the used piñata! Right now, being close to the playoffs doesn't mean anything.

Oh sure, you're driving around in your expensive cars, eating at nice restaurants and sleeping in your million dollar homes with comfortable beds with no fear of river snakes. But if you don't hit those Canucks in the face and play hard tonight...well then you might as well move into a VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER! And where will you be then? I'll tell you. You'll be on a steady diet of government cheese and used Pall Malls wondering what happened to your shattered life. Trust me, you don't want that.

(leans forward, squinting)

I can't see too good. The guy with all the goalie equipment over there, is that Martin Broduer? NO! It's Chris frickin' Mason! That guy can't do it by himself. He needs help. Asking him to win the game by himself against Vancouver is like asking a guy who lives in a van down by the river to have a meaningful relationship with a woman who isn't a hooker.

Now you Blues players, I want you to get fired up. I want you excited. You can beat these Canucks. You can check those Swedish twins and keep them off the scoreboard. You can make something of your season. And if you lose tonight, I might have to move in with you to make sure you learn your lesson. My bags are packed. If you don't want that, then go out there and kick some ass! Let's go!

(turns to run towards door, collides with folding table breaking it in two)


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