I've Got A Call On The Other Line

by Brad Lee on Mar 4, 2009 12:52 PM CST

Scene: A golf course in suburban Dallas. Brett Hull is in a golf cart talking on his cell phone.

Yeah, I'm over the Avery thing. He's with the Rangers. Who knew they'd be interested in our sloppy seconds. (click) I've got a call on the other line. This is Hullie, shootin' par and smiling. What's up?

Hull. It's Burke. Who do you want to acquire from my team? You have 25 seconds.

Gm_brett_hull_medium Call me tomorrow. Or send me a tweeter thing. I'm playing golf.

Gm_brian_burke_medium The deadline's today, dumbass. I'll Twitter your (click)...I've got a call on the other line. This is Burke. Don't waste my time.

Burkie, Bobby Gainey here. I'm trying to unload one of my mafia guys. Or maybe get a goaltender that doesn't wet the bed at night. Interested?

Gm_brian_burke_medium Do I look like John Ferguson Jr. to you?

Gm_bob_gainey_medium No. He has better hair. (click) I've got a call on the other line. Bonjour. Je m'appelle Bob.

Hey poutine breath. Doug Risebrough here. Have I got a deal for you. For the low price of your three best defensive forwards in your system, you can have Marian Gaborik and his surgically enhanced groin. I'm ready to do this thing.

Gm_bob_gainey_medium Does he speak French? And what if we don't have any defensive players in our system?

Gm_doug_risebrough_medium Dangit. This is a lot harder than I thought it would be. Who wouldn't want Gaborik? He's looked great in all six games he played this season. (click) I've got a call on the other line. Minnesota Wild, we like offense, I promise. This is Doug.

This is Lou Lamoriello. What's new, friend? You will trade me for Jay Pandolfo, yes? If you say no, I could just send a demon through the phone lines to posess you and bend your will to my needs.

Gm_doug_risebrough_medium I...uh...Seriously?

Gm_lou_lamoriello_medium Just kidding! I haven't been able to perform mind control on someone since Judge Houston died. You're safe...for now. (click) I have a call on the other line. Devils Hockey where Newark isn't as much of a war zone as you think. This is Darth Lou.

Lou, Larry Pleau with the Blues. Keith Tkachuk will waive his no trade clause and join the New Jersey Devils. We would like...

Gm_lou_lamoriello_medium No. Trade me Oshie.

Gm_larry_pleau_medium Uh, no.

Gm_lou_lamoriello_medium You will trade me Oshie.

Gm_larry_pleau_medium I'm wearing garlic around my neck and I'm holding an oversized silver cross. THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU to trade for Tkachuk. (click) I've got a call on the other line. This is Pleau. Geaux.

Larry, Ken Holland with the defending Stanley Cup champion Detroit Red Wings. I'd like to acquire Ke (click) ith...hello? Larry? Dammit, he hung up again. I wonder why?

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Comments

I love it!!

That last line makes me think of Pink Floyd. Which makes me think, any entry from the PHX GM would be prefaced by an operator asking the other GM if they’d accept a collect call ….

That Bob Gainey photo always makes me laugh. Party On, B-Rad

.... formerly "Tim" of StLouisGameTime.com

by CrossCheckRaise on Mar 4, 2009 1:02 PM CST reply actions

Amazing

You shouldn’t have buried it on deadline day!

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Mar 4, 2009 1:10 PM CST reply actions

Dude

I just wrote it. Time is not my friend.

And I like last year’s more anyway.
http://www.stlouisgametime.com/2008/2/26/693681/i’ve-got-a-call-on-the-oth

www.stlouisgametime.com

by Brad Lee on Mar 4, 2009 1:16 PM CST reply actions

But thanks for the compliment

www.stlouisgametime.com

by Brad Lee on Mar 4, 2009 1:23 PM CST up reply actions

Brad, you look awesome in that devil costume

by Dooks on Mar 4, 2009 1:33 PM CST reply actions

That's a nice observation

from a guy who resembles the goalie who allowed five to Detroit last night.

www.stlouisgametime.com

by Brad Lee on Mar 4, 2009 1:38 PM CST up reply actions

ZING!

.... formerly "Tim" of StLouisGameTime.com

by CrossCheckRaise on Mar 4, 2009 1:39 PM CST up reply actions

Bravo

I knew you had the connections to what’s really happening on the trade front, Brad.

I’d just love to hear the call carosel for all the hockey pundits. I bet it would sound like a grapevine from a front office guy saying a team would trade a pick for Staal all the way through channels until Eklund has an (E5) Crosby and Malkin being traded for a bag of pucks.

by Pagan on Mar 4, 2009 1:39 PM CST reply actions

Brilliant

Boosted my spirits on a thoroughly anticlimactic day.

(wow, that sounded backhanded, but it wasn’t.)

Lighthouse Hockey: SBN's New York Islanders blog with hip issues.

by Dominik on Mar 4, 2009 2:24 PM CST reply actions

You'd like last year's version more.

It’s got Garth Snow.

www.stlouisgametime.com

by Brad Lee on Mar 4, 2009 2:48 PM CST up reply actions

Fantastique!

by Marcus E Pettersson on Mar 4, 2009 4:17 PM CST reply actions

Burkie, Bobby Gainey here. I’m trying to unload one of my mafia guys. Or maybe get a goaltender that doesn’t wet the bed at night. Interested?

HAHAHAHA! awesome! I fuckin laughed so damn hard.

FUCK DETROIT IN EYEBALLS

"Go to sleep bitch! Die motherfucker die! Times up bitch close your eyes!" ~Eminem
"Turned into a monster I'm a motherfucker!!!" ~ Static X

by Carnie on Mar 4, 2009 9:41 PM CST reply actions

Funny shit

Gainey has that Mona Lisa smile going on. Same head tilt and everything. Freaky. Could it be? The bloodlines. Sacra Bleau

Life is relevant. You can put your hands on a hot stove and a fraction of a second seems like hours. Yet you can put your hands on a hot woman and hours seem to turn into seconds.

by spectr17 on Mar 4, 2009 11:53 PM CST reply actions

I knew it

Life is relevant. You can put your hands on a hot stove and a fraction of a second seems like hours. Yet you can put your hands on a hot woman and hours seem to turn into seconds.

by spectr17 on Mar 5, 2009 12:03 AM CST up reply actions