Blues Blogging From Sweden

Ooooohhhhhhh, so now it's not weird and nerdy and "unprofessional" and "asshole-y" to be a blogger! Now, suddenly, it's cool to be a blogger. Check out the Blues' own site to see blogs from Sweden from players, broadcasters and even some unidentified weirdo who is walking around in the team's locker room, wordlessly recording what all their athletic gear looks like when it's just hanging there. (Seriously, it would only be minimally creepier if you could hear some breathing or some internal dialogue: "And there's David Backes' cup... no one is here... you just know it has a strange tangy smell.... you should just take a quick sniffie....")

Instead of all that stuff, we nabbed a few of our own blog posts from Sweden that weren't deemed to be ready for the official website.

 Andy Murray: You know, I started my coaching career at Shattuck-St. Mary's, a high school that specializes in making NHL players. Well, these guys I have now aren't quite mature enough to attend that school yet. For one, everyone has heard how Keith Tkachuk woke me up on the flight over to tell me he couldn't sleep. Great prank, yes, but no one has reported the prank he pulled on me where he woke me up and said, "Coach, I can't find my finger, can you reach around on your bed and see if you can find it?"

So very Planes, Trains and Automobiles. Thanks Keith.

On top of that, less than one day in on the trip and I've already lost one player.

 Cam Janssen: So team just had scavenger hunt in Stockholm County and yes, Cam got lost. Cam not know that group had left sex shoppe and Cam may have stayed too long. And then it got dark and Cam no have St. Louis posse to get Cam back to road-home-room to stay in when not home. Cam finally home now after long night of sleeping on bench and Cam Smashing people in their faces when they ask if Cam alright. Fuck yes, Cam alright! Cam Smash!

 Chris Kerber: Howdy folks and welcome to another great blog brought to you by the St. Louis Blues and Blues hockey. Blues hockey: Only we can steal our new 'Puzzle' marketing campaign from the autism awareness campaign and not have any idea that it might not send the right message!

So far, so good over here in Sweden, though the shortage of McRib sandwiches has me a bit off my game. Had customs not confiscated my personbal stash we might not yet have this problem. Of course, the bigger problem? The Dee-troit Red Wings and their Swedish-heavy lineup will essentially get two home games here against the Blues, which might not be a great way to start the season.

But even more fucked up than that? New Blues color man, Darren Pang, has acquired a new David Hasselhoffesque habit in his speech. If he keeps it, Blues fans, I might just kill that little sawed-off bastard.

 Darren Pang: Bingo-bango-bongo, Blues fans! Holy jumpin' is this trip to Sweden the greatest! The guys are loving it, the staff is loving it, I'm loving it... well, we're all just loving it! Tonight we had a game against Sweden's own Linkoping and HOLY JUMPIN'! what a game! I nearly went Linko-Pang! with how great the young Blues played. A nice 6-0 win met all the Blues' fans' goal-scoring hunger PANGS! and answered a lot of questions for head coach Andy Murray.

On top of that, these young guys are just growing in confidence and excitement. I've been with young teams before, fellas, and let me tell ya, this one is different. These guys have a wang-PANG-thank-you mang that I just never saw with the young Coyotes. These guys believe in each other and what they can do to skate, shoot, crash and PANG for one another out there. Even the young guys are really stepping up. Look at sophomore Patrik Berglund, who, coming home to play these three games has really taken the lead in showing his teammates around.

It's been PANG-tastic!

 Patrik Berglund: Allvarligt, min bitchings måste du alla vara svalare. Min familj är här, min flickvän här. Kan inte veta om min Livings i USA. De kan inte veta om vägen horor och blåsa av jobben. De måste bara höra om hockey och varorna. berätta för dem om Osh och Walt och wahtnot.

Berätta för dem annat än sanningar. Allvarligt, douchies, ingen talar om min amerikanska erfarenheter. Berätta för dem bara om Hockeys.

Jag vädjar till er! Jag lovar, alla drinkings är på mig om du bara är cool!