As well-received as the previous Fanpost was, I decided to try capturing lightning in a bottle again. Thanks to Maverides and Tomorrows Blues, we have our first Team Name That Should Not Be.
Maverides said, "The Syracuse Crunch. I live there I route for the team but you don’t name a hockey team after a fucking candy bar. That Nestle left the area and pulled out of the team a couple of years later just makes it worse that they are still stuck with the thing."
To which Tomorrows Blues added, "Not only is the name “Syracuse Crunch” stupid, but the logo is idiotic as well. Seriously, WTF is that thing… a white baboon?"
Right there, folks, you have a good reason to dump the team name. Now as for other team names that need to go or have mercifully gone into that good night, read on...
Okay, I'll admit that I'm not the ultimate Springfield Jr. Blues fan. I watch the games occasionally via webcast and finally have the scratch to support the team by buying season tickets. Unfortunately, it means going to NAHL games where the opposing teams are often named by random happenstance or by picking out a random string from the Necronomicon, I don't know. For instance, duing the Jr. Blues' early years, they often faced off against the Compuware Ambassadors.
Ambassadors? Seriously? SERIOUSLY? Oh good grief. What's next? The Cicero Skeevy Political Appointees? The Moline Guys Who Just Show Up to State Dinners for the Breadsticks? I don't mind that it was a company team instead of a geographically-based team, either; then again, I'm a fan of Japan League baseball, too. Thankfully, though, the Ambassadors had their name credentials revoked and the moniker is now relegated to the hockey history books. As Blues fans, we can also laugh a little in that they were originally the Jr. Red Wings.
Another one that needs to go is the IceRays of Corpus Christi. Rays, skates, and sharks don't care much for ice from what I've read about icthyology. Then again, I haven't read every exhaustive treatise or Wikipedia page on cartilaginous fish. Maybe if the IceRays mascot was something like a giant cannon that shot ice rays and froze people solid, then we could get behind the name. Until then, though, just no.
As for NHL teams, I hate to say it, but the Ducks name needs to go. The only way to truly exorcise the ghost of Michael Eisner's licensing and synergy-promoting deathgrip from Anaheim is to get a new name. Sure, they got rid of the "Mighty" part, but it's still walking, talking and quacking like Michael Eisner's duck. Not even Lord Stanley's Cup can erase that misery.
And finally, I have to say something about the Springfield Jr. Blues. It's great that my hometown team shares a name with an NHL team but it's also unimaginative. So, it's on the opposite end of the spectrum from the IceRays. There's context for the name, though. Long ago when Springfield, Illinois, had A, AA and AAA minor league affiliates of the St. Louis Cardinals at various times, one of the incarnations was called the Springfield Cardinals (when it wasn't being called the Redbirds). So, people of Springfield, Illinois have always had an affinity to St. Louis teams. The guys who brought the team to the city were able to capitalize on that phenomenon, and thus we've had the Jr. Blues for 17 years now. I think calling the team the Bluenotes or something similar might have been a better choice to keep the Cardinals-Redbirds tradition, but at the time they showed up, I was in New Mexico fixing aircraft and drinking to excess during my time off.
So, gang, what team names would you like to see cast into Hockey's Pit of Ultimate Darkness?