FIXED NEWS: Escalator No Longer Broken
by Brad Lee on Sep 21, 2010 9:19 PM CDT
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Blues fans getting less exercise during the first preseason game. (gallagher photo)
When news breaks, we fix it. Tonight for the first time since Oct. 8, 2009, Blues fans were able to ride in mechanical comfort from both sides of the Drinkscotch Center's main level to the penthouse mezzanine. Nearly a year ago after the home opener loss for the 2009-10 season, the escalator near the main atrium of the stadium malfunctioned injuring some fans and giving many a pretty good scare. That was the only night of the season that escalator was operational. The rest of the season, a blue curtain and makeshift merchandise stand blocked the ugly truth that a movable stairs was immovable.
So in other words, the ownership of the Blues fixed the goaltending but didn't address the team's offense, but the people too lazy to take the stairs have a quick way to the cheap seats. Don't get me wrong, I take the escalator pretty much every game. But a scoring winger would be nice too.
And I don't care if you saw the escalator working for Lady Gaga or some shit. That doesn't count. The Blues played a preseason game, by the way. I'm sure one of the teams won. I voted in the poll earlier Tuesday that the preseason sucks.
This was a special Fixed News report. We now return you to our regularly scheduled dick jokes.
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“I have a roll of lifesavers in my pocket and pineapple is next!”
"Tell Sigmund Freud not to worry about his mother, I took good care of her last night. BOOYAH."
Certified Grabbo lover
Mitch Hedburg (RIP)
"An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You would never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience."
www.stlouisgametime.com
Fuck my balls. When I read your post that was the first thing I was gonna say when I came in here.
He raged at the world, at his family, at his life. But mostly he just raged.
Just because Jay McClement is the best defensive forward in the NHL doesn't mean he should win the Selke.
I fully expected the title to read "Escalator No Longer Stairs".
by BleedBlue42 on Sep 22, 2010 12:34 AM CDT up reply actions
same here
"Tell Sigmund Freud not to worry about his mother, I took good care of her last night. BOOYAH."
Certified Grabbo lover
Don’t act like I didn’t buy that donut!
No beer and no TV make Homer...something something.
by Poor College Student on Sep 22, 2010 11:41 AM CDT up reply actions
Do you have the receipt?
He raged at the world, at his family, at his life. But mostly he just raged.
Just because Jay McClement is the best defensive forward in the NHL doesn't mean he should win the Selke.
I got the documentation right here!
Oh wait. It’s at home, in the file.
Under “D.” For “donut.”
No beer and no TV make Homer...something something.
by Poor College Student on Sep 22, 2010 6:50 PM CDT up reply actions
Thanks
Hey man thanks involving my poll in this. Appreciate it.
Cardinals and Rams slipping but gotta stay true. Blue are gonna start a new dynasty of winning. -Louie Broviak
They've gone the way of Busch Stadium?
Fuck.
$9 for a 2-by-4 wasn’t all too terrible. Charging that for a 16 is just fucking criminal.
St. Louis Game Time . . . I need another beer.
And I can also write things in 140 characters or fewer.
And Now For Something Completely Different
watching the Blues while sober.
I know it is custom to tailgate before NCAA football because they don’t sell beer at games, but I’m all up for tailgating before hockey games now.
St. Louis Game Time- The Game Day Guide to St. Louis Blues Hockey- www.stlouisgametime.com
a word of advice
since its too expensie to get smashed at any sporting event these days, and sometimes a flask won’t hide the fact that the Blues are blowing another 3rd period lead late. You can alwyas pay the 15 bucks to park in the garage run out during intemisions and chug to your hearts content, all while keeping it light on the back pocket
Dayum
That escalator was almost our demise that night. Me nancing around trying to decide where to buy a shirt saved us.
Fate FTW.
Just a chew toy for the hockey gods
Yeah I had....
just stepped off the thing……then after hearing the blood-curdling scream my EMT instinct took over…..
Not a fun night……
I still maintain Vladimir Konstantinov got what he deserved...If you can't handle that then kiss my ass......
"I've got a bad feeling about this..."
My I ask
what the real injuries were?
I ask, cause I watched final destination a couple of nights ago, and all I could think about was the drinkscotch escalator.
PC Load Letter? What the fuck does that mean?
The sound of that escalator unspooling was a sound I had never heard before
Both my friend John and I looked at each like WTF was that? Then the scream and moans and we knew it wasn’t good. We all jammed forward to look at the dog pile of people at the bottom of the escalator turned staircase. About 10 minutes later we finally got down to that lower level. We were about to enter the souvenir shop and they still had 3 or 4 people laid out being treated.
Just a chew toy for the hockey gods
Worst I think was
Just a broken foot……lots of scrapes and bruises……
I still maintain Vladimir Konstantinov got what he deserved...If you can't handle that then kiss my ass......
"I've got a bad feeling about this..."
You know what I like?
Aside from the fucking buzz im currently rockin? We were mediocre as fuck, did stupid shit and were all around disappointing last year. You know why I like that? Cause we put up 90 fucking points being baddies. 90 fucking points worth of mediocrity last year makes us godamn playoff contenders in the east. If we aren’t mediocre this year we are in the playoffs. We have some fucking potential, if we are anything close to what the fans consider good this year we will be securely in the playoffs and another step on our way. Thats why im not fucking worried and am generally optimistic about the blues. I have faith that the “the kids” will grow the fuck up and be consistent on a regular basis. Also I saw this and wanted to show Answer Man. Someone pass it along.
He raged at the world, at his family, at his life. But mostly he just raged.
Just because Jay McClement is the best defensive forward in the NHL doesn't mean he should win the Selke.
by Icion on Sep 22, 2010 1:29 AM CDT reply actions 2 recs
LOL . . . Germany as "Dirty Porn" . . . BANG!
St. Louis Game Time . . . I need another beer.
And I can also write things in 140 characters or fewer.
Yo Icion
Great graphic. I love the sentiment. I just wish they’d illustrate where the limp wristed fruits are but you’d probably have to go City by City. Or check out the vid below. Bottom line, thanks for the shout out. I fucking hate Europe.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsqdjunqkAE&feature=player_embedded
This was in France or So Co.
http://twitter.com/GTAnswerManNoCo
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