Top 11 Signs You Are A Red Wings Fan

by Brad Lee on Dec 6, 2011 8:01 AM CST

The Detroit Red Wings are in St. Louis tonight. You know we have a special affinity for the Wings, and more importantly, their fans. So to all the people who wear red for tonight's game and wonder why Blues fans don't enjoy your company, here are some signs we know you like the Red Wings.

Top 11 Signs You're A Red Wings Fan

11. You think Chris Chelios' restaurant is a really fashionable place. To get shot.

10. On your unemployment form, where it says city you put, "Hockey Town."

9. You think the NHL was invented in 1995.

8. You think Gordie Howe is Steve Yzerman's dad.

7. You wear a Wings sweater to a game in St. Louis with the Canucks in town.

6. You don't read most hockey sites on the Internet because they're just jealous.

5. In the heat of the moment in bed, you yell out Lidstrom's name.

4. In your universe, Kris Draper and Kirk Maltby were good hockey players.

3. You don't even need a Stanley Cup Final series to burn part of Detroit to the ground.

2. Thanksgiving dinner was catered by Little Caesars.

1. You can't take a joke.

Have any to add? Any you don't like? Let us know down below.

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Comments

12. You think Vladimir Konstantinov was a good Defenseman.....

whereas at least one person here thinks he was just a cheap shot artist that got what he deserved……

I still maintain Vladimir Konstantinov got what he deserved...If you can't handle that then kiss my ass......

"I've got a bad feeling about this..."

by dablues7 on Dec 6, 2011 8:14 AM CST reply actions

What is this I don't even

by timr92 on Dec 6, 2011 3:39 PM CST up reply actions

Would you look at that...

Only took one comment.

by Rondo311 on Dec 6, 2011 3:54 PM CST up reply actions

13. You take Herbalife to fulfil your Amway requirement

St Louis Blues - Season Ticket Holder - Sec 106
SUTA
Twitter: @jdandturkelton
What Exactly is a God Wand?
Anyone who says "Nuff said" or "Need I say more?" needs to be elbowed in the cock.

by I_AM_SPARTACUS on Dec 6, 2011 8:21 AM CST reply actions

14. People in BALTIMORE point and laugh at your city

Baltimore Blast - 6-time MISL/NISL Champions
Let's go Blues!

by UIWWildthing on Dec 6, 2011 8:25 AM CST reply actions 1 recs

DAMN!!!

St Louis Blues - Season Ticket Holder - Sec 106
SUTA
Twitter: @jdandturkelton
What Exactly is a God Wand?
Anyone who says "Nuff said" or "Need I say more?" needs to be elbowed in the cock.

by I_AM_SPARTACUS on Dec 6, 2011 8:46 AM CST via mobile up reply actions

Along those lines...

… enjoy some Youtubage.

by BleedBlue42 on Dec 6, 2011 2:38 PM CST up reply actions

Fun times in Cleveland again!

Only if they bring back the Barons.

Let's Go Blues!
Support your local NAHL team. Seriously.

by Paperwork Ninja on Dec 6, 2011 3:32 PM CST up reply actions

4a)

And Chris Osgood.

St. Louis Game Time

by averagejoe on Dec 6, 2011 8:27 AM CST reply actions

deserves to be in the Hall of Fame

just look at his accomplishments man. To that I respond, Redwing please. Of course I then follow that with a hearty Fuck Detroit!

by Mo'FiZZle on Dec 6, 2011 8:58 AM CST up reply actions

15

You get all pissed when you hear people are trying to smuggle books into Detroit, but are secretly confused as to what a book is.

Please do not support "Little Caesars" Pizza . The money you spend there is part of the evil plan to help support the Detroit Red Wings. Think I am making this up? Check it out - http://www.ilitchholdings.com/

by TerrapinKen on Dec 6, 2011 8:49 AM CST reply actions 1 recs

Tomas Holmstrom is under rated and never gets fair treatment. He in fact never dives or whines.

Redwing Please…Fuck Detroit!

by Mo'FiZZle on Dec 6, 2011 9:03 AM CST reply actions

uhhh wrong

I yell stevie in bed. GO Wings.

by bond021 on Dec 6, 2011 10:07 AM CST reply actions

Does he know you’re talking about Yzerman and not him?

Look I'm sure youre a nice person and everything but that Redwings jersey you're wearing makes me want to cave your face in with my fist...it's not you it's me and the fact that you're a fucking Redwings fan

by RFJCC on Dec 6, 2011 3:53 PM CST up reply actions 4 recs

Aaaaaand

BOOM goes the dynamite!

by k10patel on Dec 6, 2011 4:54 PM CST via iPhone app up reply actions

Well done.

I am The One Who Shall Remain Avatar-less.

by Classic17 on Dec 6, 2011 6:02 PM CST up reply actions

16. You think Detroit is the toughest city in America.

Fuck that, even Chechnya can’t hang with us

by mulax6 on Dec 6, 2011 12:05 PM CST reply actions

is true, #2 is funny, the rest aren’t very good. Props for at least trying something different besides saying “lol Red Wings are old lol”.

I hate Jonathon Ericsson.

by Brion on Dec 6, 2011 12:16 PM CST reply actions

Bah, damn formatting

Number 5 is true, number 2 is funny

I hate Jonathon Ericsson.

by Brion on Dec 6, 2011 12:16 PM CST up reply actions

If I were a woman, I'd bang TPH...

I don’t really get the Wing hate though. I don’t have anything against the Blues. If you’re going to make fun of us, you should start with Jonathan Ericcson, dude’s terrible.

by AppState on Dec 6, 2011 3:21 PM CST reply actions

It's a mix between a franchise that has more consisent success with making the playoffs 25 straight years but never having a championship mostly being the RedWings and fucking Yzean's fault in the 90's

And number 9 and 10 being true about the bill of the fanbase. It’s like the Red Six fan base, before ‘04 they were a decent fanbase with some good hearted Bostonians hoping for a Championship, after a little bit of success it’s impossible not to loathe the entire fanbase and the way they’ve become ESPN’s pet. Bandwagoners happen in sports and it’s nice to have everyone in a town being drawn to a sport but the Red Sox fanbase and before that and to a much higher degree the Red Wings fanbase has been ingulfed with a particularly annoying, sled emphatuated type of bandwagoner with a particular disconnection with the history of the sport and respect for it. With all other fanbases loathing the Red Wings fans and with us being the most heartbroken. By the franchise we hate the entire franchise more than anyone, in spite of our great and stories rivalry actually being with the Blackhawks

"IF CARDS CAN SIGN SUPPAN THEY CAN GIVE ME A HOME"

by Buddhasillegitimatechild38 on Dec 6, 2011 4:11 PM CST via mobile up reply actions

Wow grammar fail

more consistent success than anyone
*bulk of the fanbase
*Red Sox
*self emphatuated

"IF CARDS CAN SIGN SUPPAN THEY CAN GIVE ME A HOME"

by Buddhasillegitimatechild38 on Dec 6, 2011 4:14 PM CST via mobile up reply actions

*self emphatuated

Infatuated?

by J.J. from Kansas on Dec 6, 2011 4:17 PM CST up reply actions

Yes that

"IF CARDS CAN SIGN SUPPAN THEY CAN GIVE ME A HOME"

by Buddhasillegitimatechild38 on Dec 6, 2011 4:18 PM CST via mobile up reply actions

And to be honest I don't like being so openly and thoroughly hateful towards a team

But I feel the same way as everyone else on it and it’s hard not to

"IF CARDS CAN SIGN SUPPAN THEY CAN GIVE ME A HOME"

by Buddhasillegitimatechild38 on Dec 6, 2011 4:18 PM CST via mobile up reply actions

I certainly understand animosity based on another teams success, but I feel like hating the Wings because of OUR bandwagon is a little weak. Seems like Chicago, Pitt, and Washington should take precedence over us in that aspect.

by AppState on Dec 6, 2011 4:40 PM CST up reply actions

Oh my God Chicago winning a cup almost killed me

Im so happy I’m a Packers fan and got to see my football team stick it to Chucago in the NFCCG. It’s hard to complain when the Cardinals just won the WS and while the Packers are undefeated defending champs, but being a Blues fan is a painful endeavor

"IF CARDS CAN SIGN SUPPAN THEY CAN GIVE ME A HOME"

by Buddhasillegitimatechild38 on Dec 6, 2011 6:29 PM CST via mobile up reply actions 1 recs

Yeah

…..yeah pretty much it.

He raged at the world, at his family, at his life. But mostly he just raged.
Aren't you that guy who hates the blues?

by Icion on Dec 6, 2011 6:27 PM CST up reply actions

I love when people from Detroit don't understand the rivalry

This is exactly why number 9 is true…

by RFJCC on Dec 6, 2011 3:54 PM CST reply actions 1 recs

lot of fans are under ~30

They weren’t around for the horror show in the early to mid 80s.

Eat 'em up, Tigers!

by ahtrap on Dec 6, 2011 6:22 PM CST up reply actions

I'm 22

I still honor and recognize the past of the team I love, both good and bad

by RFJCC on Dec 6, 2011 6:24 PM CST up reply actions

17.

You’re Poor.

www.twitter.com/ian_reynolds

by Boomer9393 on Dec 6, 2011 4:23 PM CST reply actions

18.

Merely making the playoffs is a huge disappointment.

Eat 'em up, Tigers!

by ahtrap on Dec 6, 2011 6:23 PM CST reply actions 1 recs

See this is what we're talking about

Montreal and Toronto are 1 and 2 in cups and playoff appearances, hell even the Bruins have more playoff appearances than the wings, just less cups but you have no idea about any of this because you are a typical Wings fan, direly in love with yourself like a compulsive masturbator. When you go around acting like you’re the Yankees or Canadians, at least have that kind of history, but you are completely delusional. If you think we hate you, talk to a Canadians or Maple Leafs fan about how great your history is like you are doing here an see how they react.

"IF CARDS CAN SIGN SUPPAN THEY CAN GIVE ME A HOME"

by Buddhasillegitimatechild38 on Dec 6, 2011 7:20 PM CST via mobile up reply actions 1 recs

Detroit, as a so-called ''hockey town,'' can't hold a candle to either Montreal or Toronto...

As shitty as the Leafs have been for lo these many years, they still have more of a long-term history of success than the Bandwagoners in Slumtown.

"If we do not prepare for ourselves the role of the hammer, there will be nothing left but that of the anvil."

-- Otto von Bismarck, 1851

http://futurenotes.blogspot.com

by Tomorrows Blues on Dec 8, 2011 5:16 PM CST up reply actions

19

You own a bunch of red wing stuff and “love” the red wings “so much” and then you never go to any of the games or actually watch any of them.

Michigan is full of these fucks. It makes me fucking sick. If you’re gonna diss me for wearing my blues jersey then you need to be a real fan, not some bandwagon jackass.

I am a direct descendant of Buffalo Bill Cody -- Everything makes so much more sense now.

by Carnie on Dec 7, 2011 1:58 PM CST reply actions 1 recs