Tuesday Links: Nobody Buy A "RIVS" Jersey Edition

When TB dropped the news that Peoria clinched a playoff spot by scoring 5 unanswered goals to beat Chicago, I couldn't wait for the highlights to go up. Those highlights had everything: Big Allen saves, mustaches and... nickname 3rd jerseys? Those super suck. A few days later, they still super suck. I mean... "RIVS?" I know the minor leagues do a lot of fucked up uniform shit, but there's a reason why the Senators won't be playing Super Nintendo next year.

Blues/Rivermen News

• I did a Peoria header/intro because they're still playing and the Blues aren't. Posting Rivermen links helps balance out the gatdamn sadness of the rest of the Blues links. The Calder Cup Playoffs start tomorrow with Peoria taking on Houston. [Rivermen]
• This draft pick we traded to Colorado has been a hot point of debate for some people when it really shouldn't be. We're losing a 1st-rounder either way, so why not lose it in what's considered to be one of the weakest draft classes in years? Forget 2011, yo. [P-D]
• David Perron still is having concussion issues. Are we sure he's not Paul Kariya? [Canadian Press]
• Da Blooz: wuh dey gon' do? [P-D]
• A buncha douches debate on what was the downfall of the Blues this year. Fuck all your paragraphs, sports writers, because I'm 'bout to learn ya somethin': their downfall was existing. [P-D]

NHL/Hockey News

• Patrick Kane will again be Super Chode 20X6 for this year's playoff run that will end in a crushing sweep. [Puck Daddy]
• NBC/Versus will use a combination zamboni and ice cream truck to promote the playoffs while ESPN tries to buy the rights to next season. Can you guess who's going to win there? Easy, again: the one who doesn't have the ice cream truck. [Puck Daddy]
• Our Wilds-loving SB Nation brethren react to the news of Todd Richards' firing. [Hockey Wilderness]
• Along with Minnesota's opening, there are many vacancies to be filled. While there's no opening for head coach in St. Louis, the front office is accepting applications for the opening on Davis Payne's head. That little patch of hair ain't cuttin' it anymore. You're going bald, man. It's okay. [ESPN]
• The Florida Panthers will be using their past to help brighten their future. Can you brighten failure with failure? They've missed the playoffs for 10 straight seasons. It's like shitting on a pile of puke. [Miami Herald]
• The L.A. teams will be going to Europe next season. [Daily Breeze]
• The Toronto Star's playoff preview. [West] [East]
• The Sharks won't choke this year. Honest. [Bleacher Report]
• Top Eastern Conference seeds, beware! You may be upset once again! [amNY]
• Who got the most bang for their buck this season? Doy, Forbes knows. [Forbes]
• Adam Foote might have retired from the NHL, but he'll be in Colorado for years to come. [Denver Post]

Other Stuff

• ZOMG BUY DIS GAIYZ' APARTMENT YO. It's got WALLS and shit. Protects DAT ASS from da RAIN. [Consumerist]
• Jigsaw and Sudoku's love child sounds super complicated. It's not. It's just regla-ass sudoku. Give it a try and kill some time. People still do Sudoku, right? That's still a craze? [Jigsawdoku]
• HA HA SCIENCE JOKE. [Twenty Two Words]

Tuesday Video

Since it's the day before the playoffs, I will post my most favorite video in the world. (nsfw or your childhood)

I've always wanted to make a Game Time meme out of that stupid song that plays when Owl is slowly walking over to the window. Should I? I can't stop laughing at it.

gametimelinks AT gmail DOT com