Tuesday Links: Happy Halak

[sings] "Happy talk - keep talkin' happy talk..." - Dilip Vishwanat

My links-mastering redemption starts right meow!

With my failure to bring you sweet clickables this past Sunday, I have brought great shame to my family. Luckily, I watched Shawshank Redemption last night, and it taught me that if I...uh...haven't done anything wrong...I can be forgiven 19 years later...by crawling though a bunch of shit...?

Or I could just tag team in for Donut King, who is traveling (presumably to a new state out of embarrassment over yesterday's Newcastle bitch-slapping...way worse than Everton getting a draw on the road). I'll take option B, please.

BLUES NEWS:

  • "How I Spent My Summer Vacation: By Jaroslav Halak!" Turns out, he was happily in St. Louis the whole time! No word on if he got around to seeing The Muny's exquisite production of South Pacific. (Seriously, it was quite good.) [STLToday]
  • There isn't a second Blues link, I just wanted to mention the part of the above link that's actually (kind of) news: according to Hitchcock, Jaro is still the number one guy in the crease. I say that's as it should be at the moment...but what do you say? (That's right...POLL TIME!)

HOCKEY NEWS:

  • Remember when the NHL was going to give Toronto a second expansion team? MMmmmmyeeaah, about that... [Puck Daddy]
  • Another great piece from the SBNation Long form collection: this time on hockey - underwater! (Mind blown!) [SBNation Longform]
  • Daniel Alfredsson leaving Ottawa will be especially hard on Erik Karlsson..."on a personal level." GOB Bluth can relate. [The Hockey News]
  • Yesterday Tyler told you about how the Flyers were organizing people to set the Guinness World Record for Most People Watching Paint Dry At the Same Time. Apparently there are 195 people in Philadelphia who honestly thought that was an acceptable use of their time. All of them should be given help and put on depression medication. And the best part: the Guinness people don't consider that a category, so no one came to make it an actual record. [Puck Daddy]
  • The downloadable demo for NHL 14 is available today. It includes a limited version of the NHL 94 Anniversary mode, in case you wanted to spend the next month or so making Patrick Kane's head bleed. (Which reminds me - I have to ask off work for every day for the next month to do exactly that. Hold my calls.) Stick tap to @D_Vilhelm. [EA Sports]
  • Penguins Capitals Rangers Flyers Stars Bruins Devils legend Jaromir Jagr did a photo shoot for Reebok. He didn't exactly go The Full Chara, but it's still hilariously awkward. [Facebook]
  • Brent Seabrook just became a father for the first time (officially making him a motherfucker), and his son's name: Carter Seven Seabrook. George Costanza is furious. [Pro Hockey Talk]

OTHER CLICKABLES:

  • ESPN.com is rolling out their second annual Uni Watch Power Rankings this week. NHL rankings are slated to be released on Thursday. Yesterday they ranked the best MLB jerseys, and fans of the local 9 should be quite pleased. [ESPN]
  • What's the best way to get Facebook's attention when trying to alert them of a security bug? Why, using it to hack Mark Zuckerberg's page, of course! [Yahoo!]
  • The only thing better than putting Dave Chappelle as Prince on a fake Prince album cover? You guessed it: putting Dave Chappelle as Prince on a real Prince album cover! [HuffPost]
  • Alright fellas, we all love our beer & whiskey, but every now and then let's be real Bahama mamas and strawberry daiquiris are fucking delicious! But you've got to know how to enjoy one while still maintaining macho masculinity. There's help. [College Humor]
  • Seeing as I ruined a chance on Sunday to Break Bad on you guys again, I'll go ahead and do one here (sort of): Bryan Cranston once did a Preparation H commercial. [Vulture]

VIDEO:

Once again, I am sorry I let down my Game Time brothers and sisters on Sunday. To repent, I bring forth onto you the traditional St. Louis Game Time peace offering: Super Troopers quotes.


Hell, I'll even do you guys one better - a real life Cat Game!


When was the last time you spent your Tuesday with Hildy? ...What's that? Last Tuesday? ...Well, it's Tuesday again, so stop by later for another introduction to a division foe.

Donut King will probably be back tomorrow. Send him your shit.

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