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Blues At Hawks Third Period

The headline is Blackhawks Still Suck

By Brad Lee

The above gentleman is loyal GT reader Greg Gaz who posed with some Hawks fans last year with his copy of GT. Apparently they didn't realize the headline read "Blackhawks Still Suck."

The score is 2-1. Lee Norwood Stempniak (thanks Dooks) was pretty sure that Marek "I Am Not A Monster (Elephant Man reference)" Schwarz will close the door. Maybe he was thinking Schwarz was still closing the the bench.

18:58 Kane scores on the power play on a one timer. Fucker. I hope he gets arrested wiht his fake ID.

I don't know how much time is left. Fuck that. On Schwarz's mask is the Predator.

I like a McDonalds reference, but I don't think we've hit it yet. Maybe the Fry Guys or the Hamburglers or The Hugo Line. Or the Trans Fat Line or Grimus and the Boyes or something.

There's less than 14 minutes to play. Still 3-1. I'll throw in a game reference every now and then to prove the game is still on, but I'm not worried about that right now. I'm finally seeing why Boston traded Boyes. The guy is streaky. You can see tonight he's trying to hard to make something happen. He's shooting it wide...badly. He's misplaying the puck and committing that big hockey sin: trying to do too much. I've written I Love Boyes or yelled it a good 50-100 times this season and I will soon pick up my Boyes sweater (that fucker Gravy tried to give me second thoughts days after I dropped it off), but I can see why he's still flawed. I really hope he's with the team long term, but he needs to learn that consistency that makes great players.

Hawks back on the power play thanks to Fragile Jay. You know he hasn't been injured in awhile. That's weird.

Fuck, 4-1.

Now this is funny. Blues with the empty net with 6:25. Federko: "That's what I call aggressive." Pussy.

Raskolnikov Says:

Andy Murray, you crazy fucker.Â
I think he's channeling this guy from Spiderman:

Only an 18 yearold little bitch shoots the puck there. A veteran passes the puck. I think Murray was just setting up Kane to look like a prick. He had a teammate on the doorstep but was selfish. It's fucked up psychology to undermine Kane's credibility with his teammates. Crazy like a fox. And I hope you bought at least a few words of that.

5-1. I can't wait for Schwarz to take the next faceoff

"If anyon just now tuning in or listening or reading in the paper tomorrow, they'll think the Blues played a terrible game. No, they played a strong game in several areas," John Kelly said. "This by no means is a 5-1 game."

Holy shit, hearing that makes my head spin. I understand the thought, "the game was closer than the score looked." But this very well is a 5-1 game. Look at the scoreboard for fuck's sake.

I stand corrected. It's a 6-1 game. Layup drill on that one.

At least when the Hawks scored on that empty net, Federko didn't say, "The net didn't have a chance on that one." Or, "I bet the net would like that one back."

0:59 "Last minute to play in this period." There is a God.

Manbones Says:

Well it was fun reading you guys’ posts tonight. It was almost like having real friends.Â
And if that doesn't embody our guy who lives in his mom's basement photo from this afternoon, I don't know what does. Having Internet friends is long as one of us isn't Chris Hansen.

Thanks for hanging out. The Blues have five road games after this. We'd even tolerate Hawks fans hanging around if they'd like. They need friends too. Feel free to break it down in the comments. Well as much as you can break down this shit box of a game.

Later, figure skaters.