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Osgood Should Win The Conn Smythe

Chris Freaking Osgood. Go figure.

By Brad Lee

Ask any Blues fans who witnessed the Chris Osgood Era in St. Louis, and that fan might say, "Chris Osgood played for the Blues? Really?" Yes, it was that forgettable.

During the 2002-03 season, he arrived at the trade deadline and played in nine games posting a 3.05 goals-against average and 88.8 save percentage. His numbers were better in the playoffs, but the Blues lost in seven games after squandering a 3-1 series lead against Vancouver. Blues fans were happy to see Osgood after watching the Blues trot out a cavalcade of stiff goaltending has-beens and never-will-bes: Brent Johnson, Fred Brathwaite, Curtis Sanford, Reinhard Divis, Cody Rudkowsky and the well-preserved corpse of Tom Barrasso.

In 2003-04, Osgood wasn't too bad. He posted a 2.24 GAA and stopped 91 percent of the shots he faced. Yet in the playoffs, the Blues bowed out in just five games to the San Jose Sharks. And then a player was arrested in a bungled murder for hire plot (probably on Osgood's advice).

Before Detroit's current playoff run taking a 2-0 series lead in the Stanley Freaking Cup Finals, the game the Blues were elminated by the Sharks was Osgood's last career playoff game. In fact before this spring, Osgood hadn't even seen the second round of the playoffs since the 1999-2000 season. It's amazing.

Here's what his numbers look like for the entire playoffs before game three at the Igloo:

  • Record: 12-2

  • GAA: 1.38

  • Save percentage: 93.9%

  • Shutouts: 3

If those numbers hold up, his would be a performance for the ages. If you look at the playoff years for Finals goaltenders and work backwards, Osgood's save percentage is the highest since since Jean-Sebastien Giguere won the Conn Smythe as the losing goaltender in 2002-03 (JS stopped 94.5% of the shots he faced). Osgood's playoff GAA of a Finals goaltender is the lowest since Jacques Plante posted a 1.35 GAA for Montreal during the playoffs after the 1959-60 season. You could argue Osgood's playoffs performance is the best in the league in about 48 years.

As a devoted Blues fan and one of the people who helped create the Internet sensation "Fuck Detroit!" it pains me to admit that unless he falls on his face the rest of this series, Osgood should win the Conn Smythe.

With this world-beating playoffs performance by Osgood, it got us to wondering why he's playing so well for the Winged Wheel now and couldn't get the Blues out of the first round during his short stint in St. Louis. We now have photographic evidence pointing us to one conclusion.

Below is his mugshot for the Blues:
What a nice-looking fellow. I would trust him.

After taking a look at it, we started wondering about that red blob on his sweater. Did he put too much catsup on his hot dog? Did he go a little overboard with the marinara sauce on his toasted ravioli? Was he painting his bathroom the day player pictures were taken? We took that photo and zoomed in on the blob. It appears to be a button and proof that Chris Osgood was secretly a double agent sent here to destroy the Blues:

We knew it! Thankfully, Osgood hasn't been with the team since the lockout so he can't perform anymore of his treachery. And the Blues have a goaltender now who made the All-Star Game last year. He's a goalie they can truly trust, Emannuel Legace. Wait, where did he come from again?
Is that catsup on his sweater?