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Finally, A Game That Doesn't Matter

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On Sunday the Blues face off against the AHL Colorado Avalanche. And whether the Blues win or lose does not matter one tiny bit. We couldn't care less if Chris 'Beard of Zeus' Mason starts or not. We don't care if Keith Tkachuk, who we're pretty happy wasn't traded at the deadline, sits out.

In fact, we don't care if Angelllla, Peter McLoughlin and Bluie the Blue Rat, all of whom were hanging out with the actual Blues at OB Clark's in Brentwood Friday night (mostly true; Bluie was actually trolling MySpacePageBooksFace for kids who were pretending they were old enough to be teenagers), dress out on Sunday.

Because it just doesn't fucking matter.

Sixth seed. Seventh seed. Eighth seed. Does not matter. At this point in the season, the Blues and their heavy beards have been playing like every night matters for a long time. It's not about who they play, it's about the Blues. When they play as gritty and scrappy and hard as they did tonight, it's going to be tough to beat them.

Tell us, who wants to face the St. Louis Blues right now? No one, that's who.

Here's a few things we do know:

  • No one wants to draw the Blues in the playoffs.
  • No one wants to draw the Ducks in the playoffs.
  • Everyone wants to draw the Blue Jackets in the playoffs, because they are as soft and sally as Struthers.
  • This team has grabbed the attention of this 'baseball' town.
  • Who do you want to shut down, the Kid Line or the Veteran Line? Because either one can kill you.
  • TJ Oshie has no choice but to play here forever. We love him, he loves us. Our own Chris Gift asked an Oshie-jerseyed dude at the bar tonight if he'd let No. 74 fuck him and the guy hesitated before he said no. But he did hesitate.
  • Our owners rule. Name one professional franchise in any sport that, when their team makes the playoffs, fans say, "I'm just so happy for the ownership." I heard it three times tonight. How batshit crazy is that?
  • If Andy Murray doesn't win the Jack Adams Trophy, Jack Adams should come out of the ground, rip the trophy out of the presenter's hand and give it to our Green Goblin.

All that said, we're in the playoffs. There's just one question left to ask...