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The Hockey Prof: New Season's Resolutions


I've never been a big fan of New Year's resolutions.  I've never really figured out why hitting January 1st should mean anything to anybody.  OK, fine, we have to buy a new calendar, but why should I re-evaluate my entire life just because I bought another set of 12 Far Side cartoons?

Besides, I've always been wary of New Year's resolutions because I suspected the people pushing us to make them were the same Catholic bastards that made New Year's a holy day of obligation.  Oh, yeah, like I'm so fucking sure it was totally coincidental that I was being forced to go to church after a night dedicated to heavy drinking.  Sorry, bishops, but I ain't buying it for a minute.

However, the start of the hockey season is something that has special meaning to me.  Life is noticeably different once the Blues are skating for real.  So it makes sense, to me at least, for this to be the time of year where I decide to make changes to what is important to me.  Now, it isn't my fault that, because it is this time of year, my resolutions will all be about hockey.  If you don't like it Mr. Bishop I suggest you go read a golf blog or something.  (Sit down Ben, I'm not talking to you!)

Resolution #1 - This season I resolve to cut Brad Winchester some fucking slack. 

Resolution #2 - If I'm watching a Blues/Red Wings game and the Note goes down by two goals, I resolve to no longer threaten to slash my wrists, nor will I any longer promise to "take out" anyone who tries to console me.

Resolution #3 - I resolve to finally make it to the Excel to see the Blues play the Wild, even if I have to pay some scumbag scalper out the wazoo for the privilege.

Resolution #4 - I resolve to drink more on game nights.

Resolution #5 - No matter where the Blues sit in the standings at any given date, I resolve to wait until the end of the season before I speculate on whether Coach Murray's parents were ever married.

I think that is about all the self-improvement I can stand at a single sitting.  But, if you have any resolutions you would like to announce I think this is the place to do it.