If you think I'm out of Payne-fully punny headlines, you're dead wrong.
- Do you know the way to San Jose? [USA Today]
- Preview. [CBS Sports]
- Davis says relax. [St. Louis Post-Dispatch]
- Will the road be kind to the Blues? If not, fire Payne. [St. Louis Post-Dispatch]
- Shitty night for Alex Pietrangelo. First he loses in the gold medal game, and then he gets sent back to juniors by the Blues. [@Jprutherford]
- Team America 6, Canada 5. Beating Canada in their backyard in their game is fucking awesome. I feel bad, however, because this is but a scroll on the bottom line for the States. This means so much more up North. [The Canadian Press]
- This is a pretty sweet victory song. [TSN]
- Pictures from the game. These are some happy, happy kids. [USA Hockey]
- Starting goaltending was ... not good for either side. Let's hope Jake Allen rebounds. [TSN]
- Every Canadian team — even the Canadiens — played last night. [Yahoo! Sports]
- And here's your schedule for Wednesday. [Yahoo! Sports]
- Ilya Kovalchuck might be traded. [Puck Daddy]
- Kovalchuck, where ever he ends up next year, is not really a good defender. [Birdwatchers Anonymous]
- Oh Captain, my Captain. Alex Ovechkin gets the C. [Japers' Rink]
- I never thought a player like Ian Laperriere to get this in depth of a look. [Broad Street Hockey]
- Saku Koivu, who has been around forever, scored goal No. 200 last night. [TSN]
- From dvdvrhs, try to do this quiz without singing. [sporcle]
- This is a very, very detailed guide to All-You-Can-Eat buffets. [Top Cultured]
- Nic Cage is everywhere. [Nic Cage as Everyone]
First up: You knew this was coming. Get used to this song. You'll be hearing it often. Congrats, lads. Way to make us proud.
Second video: More Payne. Side note: This video has 2 million views. Who is watching this bizarre video?