What's F-You Friday, you ask? It's like the Festivus tradition of The Airing of Greivances. These are mine, you add yours in the comments.
Fuck the Blues for all the changes in front office this summer. If they were just waiting for Doug Armstrong to take over before canning Wamsley and letting Kekalainen go and hiring Mellanby, then what the shit were the last two years about? Just waiting for Larry Pleau to be done fucking around? I've tended to give Larry Pleau the benefit of the doubt in his job as the GM, but the higher-ups had to know that Doug Armstrong had some different feelings about the organization, right? Were they really happy to knowingly coast along on autopilot for the last couple of seasons before letting Armstrong employ the 'real' plan?
Because that seems awfully wasteful for a team that wants more money from us this year to help keep the operation afloat.
Fuck everyone who keeps telling me that they "LOVE the way the Blackhawks built their team." You mean mind-fucking fans for two decades, miring themselves in mediocrity until their owner dies and then actually taking advantage of good picks, some money and some m ind-numbingly mundane marketing "ideas" like putting games on TV to build a good team. Genius fucking plan. Why didn't our owners think of that?
Fuck you Blues rebuilding. Right now this "Parade on Market" plan seems a little watered down to me. The management do-over is starting to look a little bit like it should have been employed a year or two ago. The players in the room have already pulled off a successful mutiny and gotten a coach fired. But most concerning to me is the on-ice product. All of the Blues high draft picks have not yet netted one explosive game breaker. The duo of Alex Pietrangelo and Erik Johnson could someday become defensive cornerstones like Al MacInnis and Chris Pronger once were, but the Blues won exactly zero Cups with Pronger and MacInnis on the blueline.
This team needs an offensive game breaker, and I have yet to see him. David Perron, is he our game breaker? Do it already then. Right now he looks like a sometimes awesome, sometimes invisible little man. Oshie could be a Brian Sutter, but that doesn't mean he's a superstar. Berglund? Eller? How many second line playmakers does one team need? Which one of those two is going to explode and become the franchise can't-trade top line set up man? Right now looks like neither. Even if they do, who's going to be the goal scorer who exploits that playmaking? Right now I don't think he is in the organization.
And don't get me started on the goaltending. That's an F-You Friday topic all its own.
Fuck you Blues Ticketing. I might not be priority this summer because I'm just a lowly season ticket holder in the cheapest seats in the building, but in business I've always been taught to treat every customer like they are your only customer, even though it's not true. As for me and my two measly little cheap seats? No one has called, no one cares. Guess who else is starting to not care?
Fuck you Answer Man You and your poignant conversations about values. Let me sell out already! I had a conversation with the Answer Man years ago about punk rock and GT and not selling out and staying true to your roots to stay happy. Why can't I sell out? Believe me, we've had opportunities to do so and I have sabotaged each and every one of them. What the fuck, am I retarded? Thank a ton Answer Man - this is all your fault.
Fuck you Gary Coleman. You and Dana Plato and Todd Bridges too. Yeah, that's right.
Fuck you SBNation. The fact that this article isn't called Fuck You Friday already chafes my groin, but the fact that I heard about the Official SBNation Meet Up St. Louis! by reading about it in a FanPost on our own site just lets me know what you think about me, too. My guess is that it's Fuck You Friday every day at the ol' HQ when it comes to Game Time.
Fuck you George Lopez. I'll watch your show if it's that, Jay Leno or getting my dick smashed with a brick, but it's a narrow victory over the brick. Sure, you're better than anything Carlos Mencia ever put on TV, but your show is still only a scritch better than a dick-slamming brick, so maybe ease up on the self-satisfied smug and kiss-assy questions. That bitch you're interviewing is a watered down Ryan Seacrest after all. Let's not pretend she's actually important.
Fuck you Eric Brewer. If robots could express emotion the first one you would have learned would be surprise when you were offered F-You Money for being the worst plus-minus player in the NHL over the last five seasons. If you were a President, we'd be looking to impeach you. Get off my team. Get. Off.
Feel better? I do. Got some of your own F-Yous for Friday? Let's see 'em in the comments.