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Thursday Links - Halloween Is Meh

Halloween. Boston Strong. Steen. Beyond Checkerdome. Backes and his dogs. Varlamov. JFK. Kessel. The NFL is stupid. And the greatest flight safety video in history. No game today. Sorry!

By Donut King

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This apparently counts as a Halloween costume in Calgary. I suppose it could be worse.
This apparently counts as a Halloween costume in Calgary. I suppose it could be worse.
Derek Leung

So two things happened last night that I hated. The Cardinals lost, and the night ended which led to Halloween, a holiday I've never really cared for.

Whatever. Links time. Also, fuck baseball for a while.

BLUES NEWS:

  • Robb gives his take on the hot start of Alexander Steen while reminding us that, yes, he is due to regress at some point. He also shows us some cool new toys he gets to use. [SLGT]
  • Episode 15 of Beyond Checkerdome posted yesterday. In this edition, Tim and I talk about beer, the two games, John Scott, rules interpretations in the MLB and NHL and . . . more beer. [SLGT]
  • Here's an incredible story from the New York Times. It involves a dog on "death row", "dognapping", someone wearing a fake mustache and the attention of our own Captain, David Backes, offering to help. This is something else. (S/T to CrossCheckRaise, who got this via the awesome Katie Baker, who supposedly will be on the Marek vs. Wyshynski podcast this afternoon) [New York Times]

HOCKEY NEWS:

  • Four games last night. All of them ended. [NHL.com]
  • Three games tonight. They all will involve hockey players. [NHL.com]
  • Hockey's big story last night, unfortunately, had nothing to do with anything on the ice. Avalanche(s) goaltender Semyon Varlamov turned himself in to police on charges of domestic assault and kidnapping. This is still developing. (Plenty of pieces out there on this story, but this one was sent to me by @D_Vilhelm) [CBS Sports Eye On Hockey]
  • Here, you can hear rare audio of John F. Kennedy bitching about the US hockey team and their lackluster performance at the 1963 World Championships. [Deadspin]
  • Phil Kessel is pretty Goddamn good. Maple Leafs blogger Jeffler has compiled a bunch of quotes from Toronto media types (mostly MSM) bashing Phil Kessel over the years, even as recently as THIS offseason. [The Leafs Nation]
  • Puck Daddy came through huge yesterday, if you can't tell by the next few links . . . Flyers forward Scott Hartnell has no flowing red locks anymore. The pile of hair that resulted looks a bit like what mine looked like when I used to grow mine out and get it cut. Though I'm not a ginger. It's complicated. [Puck Daddy]
  • Puck Daddy's Harrison Mooney ran down the 50 creepiest hockey logos of all time. He did it in two parts. Here's the two parts made whole. The AHL affiliate of the Blues, the Chicago Wolves, make an appearance. [Puck Daddy; Puck Daddy]
  • There's an ECHL fill-in goalie who is a Neil Diamond impersonator in Vegas. Because of course. [Puck Daddy]
  • This guy is a dick. And his girlfriend should kick him in the balls (and lemme tell you, that look on her face tells that she's at least THOUGHT of it). [Puck Daddy]
  • French-Canadians being not-so-tough hockey players is a myth that Pascal Dupuis, for one, would like to dispel, as the Penguins forward very casually pulls two of his own teeth for a trainer after he took a high stick. [Puck Daddy]
  • Sabres forward and professional shithead Patrick Kaleta spent his time off during his recent 10-game suspension getting a nose job. Who else wouldn't mind seeing it get broken again? [Buffalo Hockey Beat]
  • Teemu Selanne (#TeemuForever) will miss a couple weeks after having surgery on his mouth after taking an errant high stick to the chops. Teemu . . . NOT forever, I suppose. [Ducks]
  • Jokerit Helsinki had long been saying they were moving to the KHL starting next year, but apparently that had not become official until yesterday. [YLE.FI]

OTHER SHIT:

  • To all you Cardinals fans that took a bet with your Red Sox fan buddies, you got what you deserved. Red Sox in 6. I got a text from a co-worker literally seconds after the last pitch. I did the nice thing and congratulated her since I'm not a dick. The better team won. [SB Nation]
  • Before the game, a Midwesterner currently living in St. Louis was arrested for plotting a terrorist threat in Boston via social media (Twitter accounts which he deleted, but uhhhhhh . . . the Internet never forgets, bud). [Deadspin]
  • If it weren't for Gary Bettman, Roger Goodell would be the worst commissioner in North American sports today. I am DEAD serious. Here, we see his league try to regulate taunting to the point of taking away touchdowns, which is an absolutely atrociously fucking ridiculous idea. [Pro Football Talk]
  • Head football coach at Florida Atlantic University, Carl Pelini, resigned after admitting to his AD he had used illegal drugs. The Pelini family has had a fucked up season this year, actually. [USA Today]
  • It's Halloween, and I hope someone eggs this fucker's house today. [Y! / Reuters]

VIDEO:

An airline has finally figured out how to make people actually pay attention to their safety video! Of course, it's Virgin America. Not shocking. And well, WELL done. (S/T to Kate):

Very good.

Speaking of "very good", J-Mill has your weekend. You oughta send him shit to link to, because you just should: