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Top 11 Other Things T.J. Oshie's Dogs Are Responsible For

T.J. Oshie's in a little bit of hot water thanks to his pups. They've been busy though... here're other things they're responsible for.

Whoooooo's a good boy? Not Osh's dogs, that's for sure.
Whoooooo's a good boy? Not Osh's dogs, that's for sure.
Dilip Vishwanat

I'm sure that you guys've heard of the issues T.J. Oshie is having concerning his dogs and his former property management group. If you haven't, here it is in a nutshell:

"Defendant's unit is commonly referred to as a 'penthouse,' which is located on the top of the building and has an outdoor patio which opens off of the main living area through four (4) large Kolbe custom made window/door units, giving a panoramic view of the City of St. Louis skyline," the complaint states.

"Defendant, during the lease term, maintained two dogs which he customarily kept locked out onto the patio. During defendant's tenancy, said dogs scratched and/or chewed on the custom screens, causing them to suffer irreparable damage necessitating the need for their replacement."

"Under the terms of the lease, defendant was fully responsible and liable for any and all injury done to the apartment unit or building and in the event the defendant did not leave the apartment in the same condition in which it was received, plaintiff is entitled to recover all of its damages plus fifteen percent (15 percent) overhead to put the lease premises back to its original condition, minus reasonable wear and tear," the complaint states.

Yeeesh. That sucks, especially the fact that the management is suing Oshie for $12,000 plus the 15% overhead. That must have been one hell of a screen door. It's not all that the dogs have been up to, though. From Brad Lee (and a little from me, since he's knee deep in Game Time paper right now) come the Top 11 Things Osh's Dogs Are Responsible For:

  1. The sequestor.
  2. The Harlem Shake videos that should have stopped being made two weeks ago.
  3. Got Kim Kardashian pregnant.
  4. Meteors. That's right, spaceborn dog turds that could destroy the earth. All their fault.
  5. The shakeup of the panel on the View. Those dogs are loyal to (some View member).
  6. Car break-ins in downtown St. Louis. Looking for money to feed their Kibbles and Bits habit.
  7. Traffic on Highway 40.
  8. The Pope. Something about a leg humping controversy the Vatican has paid money to cover up.
  9. North Korea trying to start shit with the US and South Korea.
  10. Speaking of Kim Jong-Un, I heard they were responsible for Dennis Rodman's trip, too.
  11. Declaring that jumbo-soda pop ban null and void in New York. Osh's dogs are anti-nanny state, man.