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Thursday Links - Welcome Your New Umlaut Overlord

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Some French dude got traded for a guy with a bunch of umlauts in his name. A nice piece about Chris Stewart and his brother. Matt D'Agostini lives. And Tuukka Rask needs an armored car. Get your dots ready.

ALL THE UMLAUTS.
ALL THE UMLAUTS.
USA TODAY Sports

Well, that was fun, now wasn't it?

BLUES NEWS:

  • David Perron is headed to the Oilers in exchange for Magnus Pääjärvi and a second-rounder in 2014. [SLGT]
  • Wyshynski weighs in on the deal. [Puck Daddy]
  • The Copper & Blue also reacts to the deal in typically calculated fashion. [Copper & Blue]
  • A nice piece about Chris Stewart and his brother, Anthony, and how hockey helped them fight their way to the show. [ESPN OTL]
HOCKEY NEWS:

  • Carl Hagelin may stink, according to Torts, but according to Sather he's getting a raise. [Blueshirt Banter]
  • Former Blue Matt D'Agostini will be making the league minimum for the Penguins next year. That's less than a third what he made last year, mind you. [Penguins]
  • Justin Bieber might as well have whipped out his dick and pissed on the Blackhawks clubhouse floor. Wysh has a tongue-in-cheek piece about it. [Puck Daddy]
  • Finally announced . . . the sixth outdoor NHL game of 2013-14, featuring the Senators and Canucks at BC Place on March 2nd in what will be called the "Heritage Classic". [SB Nation]
  • Crude alternate logos for all 30 teams. Some of these are downright hilarious. [Reddit/imgur]
OTHER SHIT:

  • * "FUCK YEAH I SCORED A FUCKING GOA . . . OOOOWWWWWWWWW!!!!!" [Deadspin]
  • Here's an interesting way to quit smoking . . . a wire cage surrounding your face. Because apparently cold turkey doesn't work. Good fucking GOD. [Y! / The Sideshow]

VIDEO:

Ja. Das lighter is gone.