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Saturday Links - Riding The Umlauts Out Of Town

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The Umlaut Overlord signs for a couple years at a reasonable price. Lockouts caused a baby boom in one Ontario city. Malkin does not sound like a man headed for the KHL. Clint Dempsey is coming back to 'Murica. And Homer Simpson says "D'Oh!" a shit-ton of times. Oh, and I'm skipping town.

By Donut King
/ new
Umlauts? I got your umlauts right here, fuckface.
Umlauts? I got your umlauts right here, fuckface.
Martin Rose

So yeah, this was a bad week to take a hiatus from the podcast. Blame my girlfriend.

Or don't. I don't wanna get in trouble or anything.

Anyway, this is my last links post until next Friday morning. I've got a guest linker lined up. Read on to find out who it is.

BLUES NEWS:

  • The Umlaut Overlord, Magnus Pääjärvi, agreed to a two-year RFA deal with the Blues. Looks like a good deal for both sides. [Blues]
  • Wysh writes about what the Jay Bouwmeester signing means for the Blues now and in the future. (Basically: A friggin' outstanding blue line for a while.) [Puck Daddy]

HOCKEY NEWS:

  • The timing of the most recent NHL To Seattle rumo(u)rs is quite curious, as Ryan Lambert points out in his weekly Trending Topics piece. [Puck Daddy]
  • Evgeni Malkin pretty much quashes any talk of him moving to the KHL. [Ria Novosti]
  • Studies link a baby boom in Hamilton, ON to the NHL Lockout. So the NHL Board of Governors is now on the hook for overpopulation. Thanks, assholes. [TheSpec.com Hamilton]
  • The Kings inked Kyle Clifford for two years. Presumably so Ryan Reaves can one-punch KO him again at some point. [Mayor's Manor]

OTHER SHIT:

  • ACTUAL HEADLINE FROM NEWFOUNDLAND: "Awesome Foundation Wants Awesome Ideas". (How about Awesometown, AKA Peoria . . . Illinoissssssssssss?) (From Kate) [The Telegram]
  • Also from Kate, and also from Newfoundland . . . a moose caused quite the impressive (and tragic) destruction of a beer truck on the Trans Canada Highway up there. (But how can they have the Trans Canada Highway in Newfoundland? IT'S A FUCKING ISLAND.) [The Telegram]
  • Looks like I may go to Seattle to watch some soccer . . . Sounders FC signed Clint Dempsey, arguably America's best soccer player, away from the EPL's Tottenham Hotspur. [SB Nation]
  • Kurt Angle got popped for DUI and has a fucking gnarly mugshot. [Deadspin]

VIDEO:

Been meaning to post this for a while . . . it's Homer Simpson, saying "D'OH!" for just over four consecutive minutes.

Homer Simpson is the greatest.

My guest linker for Sunday thru Thursday is . . . J-Mill! He'll have an e-mail address to send links to, but just so you know, I will be forwarding stuff to him from my account as well. So hit us up.

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