Wednesday Links - Treadmill Dachshunds

That wet fart you heard from one of the guys the Oilers had in the press box? THAT had a better effort than the on-ice Oilers had last night.

Not that I care. I really don't, actually.

BLUES NEWS:

• Do not be shocked if Carl Gunnarsson plays at some point this weekend. The specialist he's been seeing since his hip surgery gave him clearance for full contact. [StL Today / Morning Skate]
  

HOCKEY NEWS:

• Nine games. They all had finals. Some had interesting endings. One was an absolute fucking blowout. [NHL.com 10/14/14]
• Three contests this evening. Edmonton still isn't done getting its' Goddamn teeth kicked in, it seems. [NHL.com 10/15/14]
• Ryan Lambert apparently doesn't write enough for Puck Daddy (which is totally cool by me, actually). He's now up to (by my count) four columns a week . . . now writing about NCAA hockey in his new "NCAA Hockey 101" series. [Puck Daddy]
• Derek Roy did more for the Predators on this single play than he probably did all of last season with the Blues. And for a quarter of the cost. And he's no longer on a contender. Whatever, this is all lame. [Deadspin]
• The Blues used to be on lists like this, but now they're not. Icethetics runs down five NHL teams that need new uniforms. [Icethetics]
• Trevor Gillies got 12 games total for attempting to bounce the face of William Carrier off the ice like a fucking Four Square ball. (Technical terms, guys.) [Puck Daddy]
• Speaking of Adirondack . . . Scorch, the horrible new mascot of the AHL's new team in Adirondack and was probably most (in)famous for standing next to a dead firefighter's body prop, has been put out. Good. [Deadspin]
• Shannon Szabados, the young lady that helped lead Team Canada to hockey gold in Sochi, is ready to play for the Southern Professional Hockey League's Columbus Cottonmouths. The SPHL, of course, is the league the NEW Peoria Rivermen franchise are now in. [Y! Sports / Canadian Press]
• Marian Gaborik got injured? You DON'T say. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]
• Simon Gagne will be with the Bruins this season on a one-year $600K deal. [Stanley Cup of Chowder]

OTHER SHIT:

• Cleveland Browns fans are weird, man. [Deadspin]
• I don't listen to Chris Brown, but apparently this Jeremy Guthrie shirt is in reference to a Chris Brown lyric. Good on the Royals, but seriously . . . fuck Chris Brown. [SB Nation / Lookit]
• Holy mother of fucking shit. And this guy never got off the phone either. Wow. (S/T to UIWWildthing) [Grind TV]

VIDEOS:

First, this has been making the rounds . . . Tyler Seguin and Jamie Benn appeared on something called Dude Perfect . . . and did a pretty damn good job of displaying accuracy (in probably a gazillion takes, but whatever). (S/T to DanGNR):

Sorry about that music, y'all. It is a wretch.

And . . . again, this week's theme is "Stupid Animal Tricks". David Letterman is the king of these. And I think some of you may know my quasi-obsession with dachshunds. Which leads to . . . TWO DACHSHUNDS RUNNING SIDE BY SIDE ON A TREADMILL HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD (S/T to Kate):

D'AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

I'll have an announcement to make on Friday regarding the links schedule going forward. Not much changes, but there will be a slight adjustment. But for now, send me links, stupid animal tricks and shit:

• gtdonutking AT gmail DOT com
• @KingDonutI

And be on the lookout for Episode 56 of Beyond Checkerdome either tonight or tomorrow.