Tuesday Links - Look Ma, No Hands!

Almost literally nothing happened in the NHL yesterday. Did the offseason return or some shit, and no one told anyone?

And yes, Jason, I figured "hick-ster" was an endearing term. But the fact that I AM one now is partially my upbringing's fault and DEFINITELY (in part) my wife's fault. (LOVE YOU DEAR!)

BLUES NEWS:

• Petteri Lindbohm, by all accounts, was solid in his NHL debut on Sunday, despite the team sucking out loud. He was sent back to the Chicago Wolves on Monday, though, which might very well foretell the health and preparedness of Carl Gunnarsson as it relates to Thursday's game. I hope so. [StL Today / Morning Skate]
• When the concept of swearing is brought up by other SB Nation sites, apparently we're one of the first ones to be mentioned. We DO have a reputation to uphold, after all. (Anyway, don't post your images of humans on Nucks Misconduct anymore.) (S/T to bernerfederker) [Nucks Misconduct]
• Alex Pietrangelo has a niece battling cancer. She shaved his head yesterday as he shows his support. That is so Goddamn adorable. And so Goddamn admirable. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]

HOCKEY NEWS:

• One game last night. It was the first win of the season for the Oilers. And I'm wearing an Oilers shirt while I type this. Why am I wearing an Oilers shirt? Well, my brother asked me that question too, and I think my answer was something to the effect of "NO FUCKS GIVEN". [NHL.com 10/20/14]
• But hey, on to serious shit . . . TEN games tonight. The Blues aren't involved in any of them, so I guess I barely give a shit. [NHL.com 10/21/14]
• There's etiquette involved in jersey-throwing these days. Who knew? Well, Greg Wyshynski apparently did, and he disseminates in place of Ryan Lambert in the weekly What We Learned piece. [Puck Daddy]
• Biggest news yesterday was that Slava Voynov was arrested on domestic violence charges. The NHL has suspended him indefinitely. [Puck Daddy]
• There was some conscientious reaction to the news, but also some asshole reactions to the news. (And if you're that Blues fan mentioned in this post and you're reading this, stop. I never want you associated with my writing ever again. Do something else likely more meaningful to you, like--perhaps--fucking yourself. Oh, and get the fuck out of my fan base, too, while you're at it.) [The Royal Half]
• Anyway. Here is the initial release of facts from the case. Voynov's lawyers say their client was not charged. Which, I suppose, means very little at the moment. [Puck Daddy]
• Injuries! First, the Stars lose young defenseman Patrik Nemeth for the season after a freak injury involving a skate cut to his arm. [Dallas Morning News / Stars Blog]
• Continuing . . . Lightning(s) star defenseman Victor Hedman will lose 4 to 6 weeks following surgery to repair a fractured finger. Not good for the team, I'd say. [Lightning(s)]
• And finally . . . Capitals forward Brooks Laich was placed on IR yesterday following a hit from Shawn Thornton, who must've thought Laich wasn't following "The Code" or some shit. Anyway, Laich is expected to be back by the end of the month. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]
• Our old friend Evgeny Grachev got into a fight in the KHL, and while the fight was relatively "meh", the shedding of the gear by him and his dance partner was very, VERY exact. [Puck Daddy]

OTHER SHIT:

• 10 Gigantic facts about Brian Elliott moose. (S/T to CrossCheckRaise) [mental_floss]
• J-Mill mentioned it yesterday, and I'm not even a Rams fan, but holy shit did the Rams show some balls on special teams on Sunday. It was fun. [Deadspin]

VIDEO:

This week's theme? Stupid Human Tricks. This qualifies, I do believe. (S/T to Kate):

Yep, THAT definitely qualifies.

Links? Stupid Human Trick videos? You know where to find me:

• gtdonutking AT gmail DOT com
• @KingDonutI

And we recorded Episode 57 of Beyond Checkerdome last night, so it should be yours later this week.