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Thursday Links - Know What I Hate?

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Well, aside from losing to the Blackhawks? Losing to them when the team had MANY chances to make the Blackhawks need to be more desperate. But whatever. A couple more Christopher Guest skits today, including one that harkens the title of this post.

PICTURED: The Blues' lone goal-scorer last night. No. Fucking seriously. Ian Cole.
PICTURED: The Blues' lone goal-scorer last night. No. Fucking seriously. Ian Cole.
Dennis Wierzbicki-USA TODAY Sports

Here are my thoughts on last night's third period: *DISMISSIVE WANKING MOTION*

Apparently, the Blues agreed with that assessment.

BLUES NEWS:

  • "Fuck That Game". That was J-Mill's Tweet for this recap, which includes a Ren & Stimpy clip. Yeah, Blues lost 4-1 after a completely fucking shitty third period. [SLGT FanShots]
  • The victors enjoyed it a bit more. [The Committed Indian]
  • Before the game, J-Mill's interview with his pal Jim Kress went up. [SLGT]
  • Also before the game, Jay Bouwmeester was declared unfit to go due to a groin issue. He may be declared good to go tonight, though. [SLGT FanShots]
  • Know who IS going tonight? Martin Brodeur . . . okay, Marty, please don't suck. Please. PLEASE. Okay, thanks. Go get 'em. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]
  • Speaking of Brodeur . . . former NHL official Kerry Fraser--who has a blog at TSN these days--recounts his time officiating Brodeur. Quite fondly, it appears. [TSN / C'mon Ref]
  • Brodeur's fantasy hockey impact--if you're interested in that sort of thing--is broken down here. [Dobber Hockey]

KNOW YOUR ENEMY--THE NASHVILLE PREDATORS:

  • Right back at it tonight. Definitely stop by and visit On the Forecheck, SBN's Predators blog. [On the Forecheck]
  • Also, Kris Martel does a pretty solid job over at The Predatorial. AND he does a little bit for Fox Sports Tennessee these days. Awesome! [The Predatorial]

HOCKEY NEWS:

  • Four contests last night. Unfortunately, one of them really sucked. [NHL.com 12/03/14]
  • Eleven games tonight. One of them is in Nashville, and you may have heard about that one. [NHL.com 12/04/14]
  • Following up on a story we've told you about since Tuesday . . . the Denver Post fired their Avalanche(s) beat writer, Adrian Dater, after a series of inappropriate conduct on social media, mostly via Twitter. He was suspended for two weeks for an unfortunate spat stemming from his opinion on Brayden McNabb from the preseason, but the final straw appears to have been some creepy direct messages in which he solicited photos from a female Red Wings fan, which said fan posted as screenshots (as linked Tuesday). The result by the DP was not shocking, but Dater sure opened up about himself while basically breaking the news to the hockey world. Look, I think a LOT of us have been harsh on Dater before--and believe me, I've been too, as you may know--but if THIS is what has to happen for him to get the help he needs, and he gets it, that's a good thing for all involved. I didn't dance on Mooney's grave, nor Lepore's. I won't dance on Dater's. [Deadspin]
  • Canadiens defenseman P.K. Subban recalls the time he told Chris Pronger to "suck it" and lived to tell the tale. This post is complete with video of the incident. [SB Nation]
  • Gordie Howe, once again, did NOT have a stroke. He was dehydrated. But he may leave the hospital soon. [USA Today]
  • Ryan Lambert takes on the Kings, Norris Trophy voting, Reilly Smith, Ed Snider, the Blues' signing of Martin Brodeur (because, seriously, despite what comes out in the podcast today, it makes NO fucking sense if you think about it enough), injuries, losing and the Devils in this week's Power Rankings. [Puck Daddy]
  • Penguins defenseman Robert Bortuzzo was suspended for two games for trying to break Devils forward and living legend Jaromir Jagr the other day. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]
  • The Ducks brought Ilya Bryzgalov in on a tryout basis. Because, yeah, they're actually having worse goaltending problems than the Blues. [USA Today]
  • Ray Kaunisto has all you Super Troopers fans in mind during this interview. Yes, me too. [Puck Daddy]
  • Capitals forward and NHL superstar Alex Ovechkin helped seven orphanages in Russia, though he didn't want anyone to know about it. [Russian Machine Never Breaks]
  • Kings defenseman Alec Martinez signed a 6-year extension with the club worth $24MM. Not bad for a dude who can Jazz Hands with the best of 'em. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]
  • The Oilers have some work to do. Will they finally start trading players? [SB Nation]
  • Domo Arigato, Captain Roboto. The Ducks brought Eric Brewer in late last week, and he's already out with a broken foot. BUT CAN HE PICK UP HIS CHILDREN?!?! (Remember THAT nonsense, Blues fans?) [USA Today]

OTHER SHIT:

  • The National Football League is open to limiting Roger Goodell's disciplinary role. Hey, I got a better idea, NFL . . . FIRE THE MOTHERFUCKER AND DON'T TURN BACK. [SB Nation]
  • You may have recently become aware of Jen LC's hockey analytical work from Puck Daddy and, before that, from other places. This time, she has a story to tell about helping someone in a bad spot. You should read this. [JenLC13]
  • A man went across Japan, tracking his whole trip via GPS, so he could spell out a message to his girlfriend . . . the end product is how he proposed to her. She said yes. And this is awesome. (S/T to DanGNR) [Y! Tech]
  • The first-ever Beer Mile World Championships--yes, this is how fast you can run four laps around a track, with beer, without throwing up--was dominated by (SHOCKINGLY!) Canada. The dudes went 1-3-5 in placements, and the winner ran it in just over FIVE MINUTES. Damn, dude. [SB Nation]

VIDEOS:

A classic Saturday Night Live skit featuring Billy Crystal and . . . Christopher Guest! . . . as "The Night Watchmen":

These people would've probably fit in as Blues fans last night.

And then, Christopher Guest! . . . this time, as Bob Dylan (S/T to doubleduck):

Nicely done, sir.

Send your links and whatever Christopher Guest videos you can find . . . THIS way (WARNING: "These Go To 11" is already covered):

And check back this afternoon for Episode 63 of Beyond Checkerdome . . . where we drink a few, looking for anything to cling to in regards to Martin Brodeur, apparently.