Friday Links: The United Provinces of Canada, Hated Upon for Common Knowledge, or UPCHUCK

Yesterday is over...get your popcorn ready for today.

HOCKEY NEWS:

• ...I just...I don't even know what to say about yesterday's Women's Gold Medal game...except that I have never in my life seen that called as a slash, let alone in overtime of a gold medal match. And...the post!...*ugh* fucking brutal. [SBNation]
• But enough yesterday's...events. Unless you're Scandinavian (sorry, Marcus), today is about one thing and one thing only. The United States pf America vs. The United Provinces of Canada, Hated Upon for Common Knowledge (or, the USA vs UPCHUCK). Your game preview. [United States of Hockey]
• There's a lot riding on this game. Namely, beer. President Obama and Head Hoser Harper have a case of their respective domestic beer that says their country will win. So there's more reason to kick some Canuck ass - we can't afford to buy other countries any more beer than we have to. [Yahoo! Sports]
• Harrison Mooney wrote a piece about today's game on Puck Daddy last night that I will not be linking to - but after we reign victorious over North America, give it a read and have a few laughs.
  
• We haven't forgotten about you, Euro GTers! Here's a preview of the other semifinal between Sweden & Finland, which when this post goes live should be starting any minute now. [NHL.com]
• Canada will be without John Tavares, as he tore his MCL against Latvia. Not only will he miss the rest of the games, he'll miss the rest of the NHL season, too. Islanders GM Garth Snow is...well, not exactly thrilled. [Pro Hockey Talk]
• After getting hit in the eye-socket with an errant puck two weeks ago, Nashville Predators and USA Hockey GM David Poile might not be able to see out of his right eye again. Terrible situation, and we wish him all the best. [Nashville Post]
• Back to the task at hand - native St. Louisan Paul Stastny knows how it is: "We don't like them, and they don't like us." [NBC Olympics]
  

KNOW YOUR ENEMY - THE RED-AND-WHITE MENACE:

• Fuck those guys. They don't deserve links.
  

OLYMPIC NEWS:

• Your updated medal count. America owns. [Yahoo! Sports]
• 17 year old figure skater Adelina Sotnikova became the first Russian to win gold in her event yesterday. But believe it or not, some people seem to think the results may were *gasp* fixed. Also, as athletic as figure skating is, it's also an artistic performance and thus can only be judged subjectively. But also, it was probably fixed too. [Fourth Place Medal]
• Great Britain will finish the Sochi games with the most medals they've won in a winter olympics since 1924. So there's something Grant Sales can focus on today instead of pretending he's Canadian. (Seriously, a Englishman cheering for a country in the Commonwealth is like an Imperial Stormtrooper rooting for Alderaan.) [Yahoo! Sports]

OTHER THINGS IN LIFE BESIDES USA-CANADA:

• There are none. Get your priorities straight, people!
  

VIDEOS:

This one I actually received from two different sources - @ChrisAhner & Ashley, aka, AmericaAmericaAmerica - Hopefully the first of two messages sent to Canada today.

Has Canada ever had a song about how great they are in one of the greatest musicals ever made? Didn't think so.

"Smoke on your pipe and put THAT in!"

Want to help me celebrate our birth in the Gold Medal game tomorrow? Send me awesome All-American links!

• jasonmcadams1120 AT gmail DOT com
• @JMill1120
• If you haven't heard yet, I've been curating the @TwkUSA account this week. Today is my last day, and honestly I'm not sure if I'll get to stay on through the game, but that's likely where I'll be doing my live tweeting from as long as I'm there.

Check out the Olympic GDT today, plus a little primer piece I'll be throwing up for the first time today...it might even become a usual thing, if you kids are good.

U-S-A!!! U-S-A!!!