Saturday Links: Canadian Gold Edition

*SIGH* Okay guys...just get your medal and get back to this hemisphere in one piece. (Although if you maybe lead Kandy Kane into a bad spot on the ice to get his bell rung, I promise not to tell on you.)

Believe it or not, in the NHL-in-the-Olympics Era no country has won as many medals as Finland (bronze in 1998 & 2010, silver in 2006). So...let's put an end to that, shall we?

HOCKEY NEWS:

• Some say that the Bronze medal is harder to win than the Gold medal, after having lost in the semifinals. If you feel up to a 9:00 am Central face off for an anti-climactic game that will probably feature quite a lot of trapping and probably Tuuka Rask, here's your USA-Finland preview. [United States of Hockey]
• If you happen to be a masochist (no judgement here), here's a recap of that Travesty On Ice, provided by Brad Lee, who apparently was so sad for his country, he didn't even feel the need to use bullet points. [SLGT]
• In the other semifinal, Patrik Berglund, Alexander Steen, & Sweden defeated their fierce boarder rival Finland. According to Swedish/Blackhawks (terrible) defenseman Niklas Hjalmarsson, they've been successful because they've been "Americanized." Just one more reason to cheer on De Tre Kronor tomorrow. [The Hockey News]
• The bright side? At least two key Blues will come home this week with a Gold Medal. Here's hoping they play forward. Fan Ta Canada! [STLToday]
• Goddamnit Canada...seeing these pictures of Patrick Kane's tears should be giving me a four-hour erection, not making me cry too! [Fourth Place Medal]
• Should the NHL participate in the 2018 Olympics in South Korea? One voice who has spoken up in favor of the idea: Wayne "Mothafuckin'" Gretzky. Which means that there's no way they don't go now. (Except probably they won't...buy maybe they will?) [Pro Hockey Talk]
  
• In light of the end of the Women's hockey tournament, it's time to take a look at the state of women's hockey. [Winging It In Motown]

OTHER SHIT:

• There were Twitter rumors last night that LeBron James would be staring in a sequel to the 1996 cinematic classic Space Jam. Apparently, those rumors were false - I assume since LeBron made The Decision to sign on to Hoosiers 2 instead. [Deadspin]
• It's Girl Scout Cookie season, so this year, don't just get your check books ready - get your craft beer snobbery ready, too! Here are some suggestions for some fine beer/Girl Scout Cookie pairings. [Beer and Brewing]
• Lorde is the New Zealand 17 year old singer behind the hit song "Royals." She also...doesn't exactly look her age, especially at the Grammy Awards. I can sympathize, as I consistently looked much older than my age between the ages of 10-19. But I was never an international pop star in the age of Tumblr. [Old Black People Who Look Younger Than Lorde]
• What will St. Louis look like in the year 2114? And more importantly, will we still be yelling "1908" at visiting Cubs fans? [Riverfront Times]

VIDEOS:

This week's Science Saturday is inspired by yesterday's...events. Why do we cry?

Yesterday I debuted a new post on how to win Twitter wars with idiots from the enemy team. Upon Hildy's request, I do plan on making that a usual game day feature once the season begins again. The only problem today: I don't actually know 3 things about Finland. In fact, the only real non-hockey thing I know about Finland comes from Monty Python's Spamalot.

I'm assuming that Olli Jokinen grew up dreaming of becoming a profession Fish Schlapper. But time makes fools of us all.

Absolutely NOTHING IN THE WORLD OF HOCKEY AT ALL IS GOING ON TOMORROW, so I'll probably need a few extra links.

• jasonmcadams1120 AT gmail DOT com
• @JMill1120