Sunday Links: Arise and Seize the Day!

The Chicago Blackhawks are nothing but a bunch of assholes in racist uniforms - but more importantly, they're mere mortals. Mere beatable mortals. The United Center is just a giant hunk of cement and steel with a sheet of ice.

You know what's at stake. I know what's at stake. We all know what needs to happen. And if any Blues fans here doesn't think it can happen, do us all a favor and get off now - because this bus don't stop.

Keep your Tuesday night schedule clear - and buckle up.

• "Hey, have you noticed how this year's series has been exactly like last year's series against the Ki-" *PUNCH IN THE FUCKING FACE*. You want to make history? First you have to break it. [STLToday]
• Dan Rosen of NHL.com has 5 keys for the Blues to force game 7. Among them: getting the puck down low on the power play, which if you've been reading your St. Louis Game Time paper, you'd know that Average Joe has been preaching that very thing all series. [NHL.com]
• "Guess who's back? Back again...[Shithead's] back...tell a friend..." I changed the words a little because Brent Seabrook doesn't deserve to even incidentally be called Slim Shady. [Chicago Sun-Times]
• In other news, yesterday could have been a big day in Blues fan-schadenfreude as both (Fuck) Detroit and LA faced elimination. The Bruins took care of the Red Wings... [Stanley Cup of Chowder]
• ...while the Kings were able to again hold off the Sharks to force game 6. [Jewels from the Crown]
• Also last night, the Avalanche sneak out an overtime win over the Wild to take a 3-2 series lead in the other half of Conference III. The wunderkind Nathan MacKinnon notched the win for the Asses...sorry, the Avs...no, I was right the first time. [Mile High Hockey]
• And noted pumpkin Marc-Andre Fleury turned back into a stagecoach long enough for the Penguins to record a 3-1 win (I know, a 3-1 win) over the Blue Jackets. #Lumbus now goes home facing a 2-3 deficit. [Pensburgh]
• At 11:00 this morning, the Flyers and Rangers will play their game 5 with a 2-2 series on NBC leading up to our game at 2 (also on NBC actual). And later tonight, the Ducks will look to close out the Stars in 6. [NHL.com 4/27]
• Elsewhere, the Capitals have fired GM George McPhee and "not renewed" Adam Oates' head coaching contract. [Japers' Rink]
• Oh and look! JERSEY FOULS!!! Hahaha...idiots... [Puck Daddy]