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Tuesday Links - Month-Long Bender

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No, I still haven't recovered from Sunday afternoon. But I'll at least provide links today. Including a video of what we should all probably be doing right now.

He's (probably) leaving. That's more booze for us.
He's (probably) leaving. That's more booze for us.
Jonathan Daniel

I'm no longer in "Fuck Everything" mode. I'm more in "Fuck Everyone" mode.

BLUES NEWS:

  • After a night's sleep, Average Joe believes the Blues are still broken, but revisits the whole thing and clarifies. [SLGT]
  • Greg Wyshynski calls Ryan Miller a playoff bust, and I find it hard to disagree, actually. [Puck Daddy]

HOCKEY NEWS:

  • The Penguins eliminated the Blue Jackets with a 4-3 win in Columbus. [PensBurgh]
  • The Wild(s) forced a Game 7 with the Avalanche(s). The Fightin' Adjectives beat the Fightin' Landslides 5-2. [Minneapolis Star-Tribune]
  • Reverse sweep? The Kings beat the Sharks 4-1 and force a Game 7. [NHL.com]
  • Only one game tomorrow, and it's in Philadelphia. The Flyers try to stave off elimination, while the Rangers attempt to advance. [NHL.com 04/29/14]
  • Mike Keenan loses his shit. [Puck Daddy]
  • Elliotte Friedman's 30 Thoughts pieces are always interesting. [CBC]
  • Here are the finalists for the Norris Trophy. My money is on Zdeno Chara, but I suspect Duncan Keith could also claim it. Shea Weber, not so much. [Puck Daddy]
  • Florida head coach Peter Horachek will probably learn about his future with the Panthers in May. He currently holds the "Interim" tag. [Sun-Sentinel]
  • NHL logos as Game Of Thrones shields. Fuck. Yes. [Next Impulse Sports]
  • What do the Red Wings do now? Ryan Lambert ponders this and more in his What We Learned piece. [Puck Daddy]
  • Speaking of Detroit, watch our pal Sarah Connors help kick sand in their buried faces in a eulogy that was VERY well done but not nearly as good as the one J.R. Lind delivered for the Wings last year. [Puck Daddy]
  • Jim Rutherford officially steps down as GM of the Hurricanes. Enter Ron Francis. [CBS Sports Eye On Hockey]
  • Brian Burke is running the show for the Flames, but he now has a GM in place . . . and it's Brad Treliving. [USA Today]

OTHER SHIT:

  • Donald Sterling is a fucking scumbag. [Deadspin]
  • "I'M'A SHOOT YA WIT' DIS TATER, PO-PO." [Y! / AP]
  • Beer blimps are on the loose in New Brunswick. [CBC]
  • 14 DUI's. 14. You'd think one would learn. [Missoulian]

VIDEO:

Not sure if I've posted this before or not, but here's what I'd like to do with my life . . . if I had nothing to live for.

SUPERSIZE ME . . . WITH WHISKEY.

Link me:

Also, Episode 41 (IRONY, I FUCKING HATE YOU) of Beyond Checkerdome will be a bit late. It was recorded yesterday (as opposed to the usual Sunday). You'll enjoy it, especially the part where Tim realizes he's a touch hammered.