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I don't have much to say up here today. Watermelon watermelon watermelon.
Links? Links.
BLUES NEWS:
- Want to relive the pain of the Blues collapse to Those Fuckers Up NorthTM? Give Tim & Tyler a listen in the latest installment of Beyond Checkerdome. Maybe if you work your feelings out with them you won't keep having that nightmare where Jonathan Toews scores the the overtime winner in game 5, then decides to keep doing it again and again and everyone in the building is forced to stay and watch and you're helpless to do anything and also you're naked and suddenly everyone turns to laugh at you including the girl you went to homecoming with sophomore year who laughs hardest before she goes home with Patrick Kane instead and LANAAAA NOOOOOO!!! .........I may have some things I need to work out...... [SLGT]
- And C&BF crunches some more cold hard save% numbers, this time with power plays & shootouts. [SLGT; SLGT]
- The Chicago Wolves had a chance to clinch their first round series last night, but lost 7-2. Jake Allen was pulled a little more than half way through after giving up 5 goals on 17 shots. The Wolves and Americans will play a winner-take-all game 5 tomorrow afternoon. [Chicago Wolves]
HOCKEY NEWS:
- The New York Rangers topped the Penguins in overtime last night 3-2 to take game one of their series...[Blueshirt Banter]
- ...after technically scoring twice in overtime. Seriously. [Puck Daddy]
- Fuck the other game. [Second City Hockey]
- Remember, we have to pretend the cabbie-punching and the woman-choking and the general douche-bagging never happened because Patrick Kane scored a pretty goal. That's how the world works apparently. (Though to be honest, that was a fantastically ridiculous goal that only a handful of people on Earth are even capable of doing, let alone pulling off at full speed in a playoff game for the game-winning goal.) [SBNation NHL]
- Game 2 of the Canadiens-Bruins series is your NBC actual game at 11:30 this morning, while the Kings & Ducks join the party later tonight. [NHL.com 5/3]
- EULOGIES!!! Rudy Kelly of Battle of California took down the Flyers. [Puck Daddy]
- Meanwhile, Daniel Wagner of Pass it to Bulis eviscerated the Avalanche. [Puck Daddy]
NON-HOCKEY-RELATED REVENUE - AND BY "REVENUE" I MEAN "LINKS":
- Some awesome new additions are about to pop-up on Netflix streaming, including a number of Godzilla movies and freaking Hook! RUFIO! RUFIO! RU-FI-OOOOOO!!! [Vulture]
- As I mentioned yesterday, I couldn't give two shits about the Kentucky Derby...but I do enjoy matching my alcohol to special occasions. As such, here are some different drink recipes for today, including bloody marys and more juleps than you can shake a stick at - or more appropriately, repeatedly strike in the ass with a whip. [Kentucky Derby]
VIDEOS:
Surely you love Batman and Spiderman. But you know the only way to make them better? Make them bestest friends, 5 years old, and seemingly invertebrate. IT'S BAMAN PIDERMAN!
This week's Science Saturday is a bit long, but on a subject many of you found yourself interested in just a couple months ago - curling. Learn about it, so you can become an Olympic curler for the USA, because it seems they'll let just anybody curl in the Olympics for America. (Screw you, John Shuster!)
Sounds like even the good curling countries don't really know how it fucking works. Yet they're still way better than John Shuster.
Help a brotha out, eh?
- jasonmcadams1120 AT gmail DOT com
- @JMill1120