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Friday Links: Once...Twice...Three Times a Stastny

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A Metro-Easter makes it, Lou doesn't care, a Russian dude eats it in a parking lot, more Ram-ing It, and the debut of Breaking Hab.

Paul Stastny, daydreaming of his inevitable return to St. Louis.
Paul Stastny, daydreaming of his inevitable return to St. Louis.
Jayne Kamin-Oncea-USA TODAY Sports

[Turns page in calendar to the 1st of a new month]

YAAAYY!!! ANOTHER MONTH CLOSER TO HOCKEY!!!

[Reads calendar]

August? Goddamnit...

BLUES NEWS:

  • Not so much "news," but Paul Stastny is set to become the 3rd member of his immediate family to play for the Blues. Papa Peter & big brother Yan are already active members of the Blues Alumni. [STLToday]
  • Is it your all-time dream to see every uniform the Blues have worn since the dawn of time in GIF form? Then you have shitty all-time dreams and you should really re-evaluate your life's goals and aspirations...but I'll still grant your wish anyway! Don't say I never did nothing for ya'! [Frozen Notes]
  • Connor Chatham, this year's 11th pick in the 3rd round of the NHL Draft by the Devils, is from Shiloh, Illinois. (For all of you Missourah folk, that's in the Metro-East.) Here's the story of his path so far. I actually work in Shiloh, and I'm 90% sure I served his grandpa in our store once. I told his grandfather not to let him play in juniors (because fuck Canada, obviously), but I guess he didn't listen, as Catham spent last season in the OHL. [STLToday]
HOCKEY NEWS:
  • A meth kingpin from Quebec was arrested for...well selling meth. Specifically, Montreal Canadiens-brand meth, presumably without the approval of the National Hockey League copyright department. I also assume the man's name was Walter Blanc. [Puck Daddy]
  • Lou Lamoriello doesn't care that the Devils are horrible at the shootout. He's probably more concerned with how horrible they are at hockey. [Pro Hockey Talk]
  • Flyers goalie Steve Mason will miss two weeks of absolutely nothing off-season work outs after injuring his little finger playing ball hockey. Too bad it wasn't a different Littlefinger that got busted instead. [Flyers]
  • Speaking of Littlefinger, how in Sid Salomon's name did I miss this piece matching every team in the NHL with a Game of Thrones character? It's from June, but it's still awesome. If you know the show, the Blues' character sounds harsh, but from what little I know of the books, it might yet turn out well...maybe...I think. [On the Forecheck]
  • How much is P.K. Subban actually worth? A lot of fucking money, that's for sure. [The Score]
OTHER KINDS OF STUFF:
  • Not only are companies legally allowed to make bullshit health claims in ads, they're legally allowed to call you a dumbass if you believe them. Seriously. What's that? "Examples," you say? Well, here are...let's say, five. [Cracked]
  • You know how it is, you're so excited leaving the liqueur store with you're 40 oz malt liqueurs that you decide to hop on your shopping cart and ride it like you're 9 years old again...and then you wipe the fuck out in the middle of the parking lot with a dashboard camera there to capture it all. [Death & Taxes Mag]
  • Beards are the best! That's not me talking, that's science. Okay, maybe "science." [Thinking Humanity]
  • A while back, I posted a video of the brilliantly 80's LA Rams anthem "Let's Ram It," and your life felt completed. Well hold on, because there's a new Making Of "Let's Ram It," and you don't even know! You don't. Even. KNOW! [SBNation Look It]
VIDEOS:


This summer is the 25th anniversary of the debut of Seinfeld. To celebrate, let Jackie Chiles give you some legal counseling.









You put the balm on? Who told you to put the balm on? I didn't tell you to put the balm on. Why did you put the balm on?




A Habs-themed meth maker? That's more than enough excuse to post a Breaking Bad video...let's take a look at what BrBa would've been like as a network show in 1995. (Possibly following Seinfeld, Thursday nights on NBC?)












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  • jasonmcadams1120 AT gmail DOT com
  • @JMill1120