Saturday Links - Jokers!

The Links Factory got backed up yesterday due to a lack of staff. As such, we told all the incoming orders to fuck off and die.

Or we were lazy, busy or all of the above. Your choice.

Also, a clarification: Halloween is rather silly and I'll barely brush it today, though the day makes me miss my grandmother's famous popcorn balls. (Okay, they weren't PARTICULARLY famous . . . well, perhaps they were famous in and around Livingston, IL, but whatever.)

BLUES NEWS:

• First, game action from Thursday . . . where the Blues won 2-1 over the Ducks and for some dumb Goddamn reason, Steve Ott was given the First Store. Way to take this seriously, MSM! [SLGT]
• Rick did his Lighting The Lamp column on Thursday in honor and remembrance of the Original Blue, Mr. Jimmy Roberts. [SLGT]
• Was the hit Vladimir Tarasenko took from Shawn Horcoff dirty, or not? [SLGT]
• Looks like young defenseman Colton Parayko will be a game-time decision tonight. [SLGT]
• Speaking of Parayko . . . a spot of praise from TSN's Scott Cullen. [TSN]
• Robb takes a look at the dataviz of the Blues' ability to goaltend in the last decade or so. [SLGT]
• David Backes says he isn't worried about his point totals. Nor should he be. [StL Today]

KNOW YOUR ENEMY--THE MINNESOTA WILD(S):

• The home of the University of North Dakota Shitsipping Crybabies Minnesota Wild(s) on SB Nation is . . . Hockey Wilderness! Go there for the other side's view, if you wish to see it. [Hockey Wilderness]
• These guys beat the Blackhawks in Chicago last night. Yay. [Sportsnet]

HOCKEY NEWS:

• Nine games last night. They all completed with a resolution of some sort. [NHL.com 10/30/2015]
• Ten games tonight. There's that one at Scottrade you may have heard about. [NHL.com 10/31/2015]
• Ryan Lambert looks into the rumors of defensive help being offered to teams in his Huge If True column. Carl Gunnarsson Trade Rumors . . . Drink! [Puck Daddy]
• He then looks into the Canadiens' hot start in Trending Topics, in which it's not just Carey Price being dominant that's helping. [Puck Daddy]
• There's a new sheriff in town at MLSE--owners of the Maple Leafs, if you don't recall--and his name is Reggie Hammond Michael Friisdahl. Pension Plan Puppets says goodbye (seems more like "good riddance") to Tim Leiweke. [Pension Plan Puppets]
• Also in Toronto, the Leafs are giving Jonathan Bernier every shot at keeping his number one goaltending job. Yeah, good luck with that. [TSN]
• This, after a game in which Rangers forward Mats Zuccarello scored a hat trick--two of them on Bernier--and a fan threw a Storm Trooper helmet from his costume on the ice in celebration of the event. [SB Nation]
• Blue Jackets star center Ryan Johansen confirmed the story about his new coach, John Tortorella, thinking he was out of shape, but was a bit pissed about the leaking of the info. [Blue Jackets Xtra / Puck Rakers]
• The Stars trolled the Canucks with Nickelback because they're from British Columbia. Which is weird, because I could've sworn they were from Calgary. Regardless, no team should subject their own fans to this shit for fun. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]
• Projected top pick in the 2016 NHL Entry Draft, Auston Matthews, was held out of a recent Swiss league game due to the dreaded "upper body injury". [Sportsnet]
• The Toledo Walleye are having an "8-Bit Night" on November 21st. 1-Up! [Toledo Walleye]

OTHER SHIT:

• Why is there an "R" in the common female prefix "Mrs."? Here's where to find out. [Mental Floss]
• ESPN is bleeding money, so what do they do? They pull the plug on Grantland--one of the few good things left about ESPN and something which doesn't seem to take up too many assets to showcase--basically because they didn't renew Bill Simmons's contract. Eh. You get what you pay in, Worldwide Leader. Fuck off. [NPR / The Two-Way]
• How many calories ARE there in a Stay Puft Marshmallow Man? [Nerdist]
• We've now reached the individual lawsuit portion of the Daily Fantasy Sports saga. This one is brought by NFL wide receiver Pierre Garçon, who plays for the Washington Tribal Natives of Maryland and Virginia or whatever. [SB Nation]
• There are SOME places where you are at risk for outdoor owl attacks. Seattle is now one of them. [Y! / AP]
• The president of a Turkish soccer club was so upset with the officials of a recent match that he locked them in the stadium overnight. It took a call from the Turkish president to get him to unlock the building. [Deadspin / Screamer]

VIDEO:

Ever wondered why they put jokers in playing card decks? Well, wonder no longer!:

Darren Pang approves.

Your Sunday Links will be covered by . . . someone or another. I think it's Hoosier Blue's turn.