Saturday Links - Happy Xmas

BluesMay forgot to pack her laptop for the drive to Jeff City. So I'm doing links. Which means, you get a shitload of them. CHOOSE YOUR ADVENTURE: I'm Sorry / You're Welcome.

BLUES NEWS:

• Robb looks at what teams' records SHOULD be based on 5v5 play compared to where the standings ACTUALLY are in this edition of #FancyStats Friday. [SLGT]
• Vladimir Tarasenko . . . he can shoot and stuff. [StL Today / Morning Skate]
• Which is good, because he can't sing. Nor can basically anyone in this video apart from Kevin Shattenkirk, it appears. (AND GODDAMNIT, CHECK IT OUT . . . THERE'S TOWEL DOUCHE.) [SLGT FanShots]
• The Blues power play is better. So is the PK, which is 22 of its' last 23. But if I mention the PK's looked outstanding since Steve Ott got hurt, I'll be labeled a hater. [In the Slot / Lou Korac]
• The family of John Kelly is hit by cancer once again. This time, it's John's wife, Jennifer. #FuckCancer [SLGT]

KNOW YOUR ENEMY--THE CAL/GARY FLAMES:

• For news and fan views from the Flames (Flams?) side of today's matchup, Matchsticks & Gasoline is the place to go. [Matchsticks & Gasoline]

SCORES AND SCHEDULE:

• Six games last night. Were the Penguins even trying? [NHL.com 12/18/2015]
• Ten games today. My wife and I will be at one of them. I bet you might be able to guess which one! [NHL.com 12/19/2015]

HOCKEY NEWS:

• Drew Doughty has never been the NHL's best defender, which is an unpopular opinion Ryan Lambert shares with the world in his Trending Topics piece this week. [Puck Daddy]
• Sometimes, it's just better to chase the money. Just ask Blackhawks center Marcus Kruger, who accepted a shorter-term deal for less money this offseason to basically ensure his RFA rights wouldn't be traded . . . but will now be out likely at least four months with a dislocated wrist. [CBS Sports]
• Five teams that need Randy Carlyle. Thankfully, none of those teams were adjudged to be the Blues. [Pension Plan Puppets]
• A follow-up from yesterday's links . . . Canucks garbage heap of a person forward Alexandre Burrows apologized for comments he made toward Patrick O'Sullivan on the ice a long while back in light of O'Sullivan's situation. [The Sporting News]
• Four possible landing spots for estranged Blue Jackets forward Ryan Johansen if the Fightin' Torts decide to deal the young center. Unfortunately, none of these four are the Blues. [Sportsnet]
• Speaking of young centers, Oilers phenom Connor McDavid has been skating with Olympic figure skater David Pelletier for the last week or so as he recovers from his broken clavicle. [TSN]
• The AHL outdoor game that was supposed to be held in Sacramento, CA between the Stockton Heat and Bakersfield Condors is postponed to today because it rained there last night. [The AHL]
• Ranking the strength of each division leader's lead. As if it matters! [SB Nation]
• Ahead of the release of Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens, ESPN threw out a garbage heap of a possible Star Wars lineup. So Greg Wyshynski, noted Star Wars fanboy, and Ryan Lambert came up with better ones. [Puck Daddy]

OTHER SHIT:

• Karma is a cruel but fair bitch sometimes. [NPR / The Two-Way]
• Someone tried to rank winter beers. I'd rather just drink them all, honestly. [Deadspin / Adequate Man]
• Spaceballs II: The Search For More Money is . . . apparently going to happen. [Nerdist]
• How all 50 state capitals got their names. [Mental Floss]
• Surfing legend Kelly Slater has figured out how to make real-ass man-made waves that you (well, HE) can actually shred. [SB Nation / #Lookit]
• Bank's so nice, they decided to rob it twice. [Y! / AP]

BEER OF THE DAY:

• Warden's Winter Ale, from Prison Brews in Jefferson City. I had one of these last night. It was tasty. [Untappd]

VIDEO:

George Harrison will forever be the best Beatle in my eye, but John Lennon crafted the best Christmas song of the quartet:

Yes.

Hoosier Blue is back with you tomorrow. Monday should be BluesMay. Tuesday should be me again.

And as I alluded to earlier, BluesMay and I will be at this afternoon's possible shitshow game. Yay?