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Christmas Eve Eve links: Tarallensaurus Rex

Goaltender hitmen, awkward grandparents, vulgar coloring books and league leaders.

How many more games are we going to have to win on our own?
How many more games are we going to have to win on our own?
Winslow Townson-USA TODAY Sports

Well lookie there, it IS possible to play a full game.


Blues News:

  • Jake Allen ties for the lead in shutouts, Tarasenko ties for the lead in goals and the Blues beat the Bruins. Hitch, keep umlat and Tara together for fuck's sake. Oh, and send Edmundson back to Chicago. Dude is a liability and Bortuzzo is playing some mad hockey right now. Justin42 has your night before the night before the night before Christmas recap. [STLGT]
  • The Bruins, who have been pretty hot, got blanked for the first time last night. Don't worry, they are taking it in stride in beantown. [SCOC]

Hockey News:

  • 9 other games last night. The Jets lost, the Wild won, and in a game with no possible good outcome, the Stars trounced the Blackhawks.  Hey, at least it was in regulation. [NHL]
  • No games tonight. Or tomorrow. Or the day after.
  • Puck Daddy has 3 stars, but none of them are Blues. I am done linking to their nightly recaps until I start seeing some Blues love (when we deserve it, anyway.) [Why you no like Blues Puck Daddy]

  • Jaromir Jagr is fucking amazing. Dude gets a few Chiclets knocked out with a blatant high stick (and apparently doesn't even get a call on the play) and taps the offender on the helmet as if to say "it's ok, son, shit happens," then returns to the game, notches an assist and later jokes about it on the twitter asking Santa for some new teeth. Wow. Just wow. [Puck Daddy
  • In a new twist on the ole 1A/1B goalie strategy, a high school hockey team played with 2 goalies at the same time in a form of silent protest.  It didn't work well as either a strategy or a protest. [Puck Daddy]
  • The Canucks play OT like a PK because skating is tiring. [Puck Daddy]
  • Shit is rough in the SPHL. The Columbus team ordered a hit on the Peoria Riverman goalie who was severely concussed on the blatant play.  The coach has also been punished for his role. I say ban both of their assess for life, including pond hockey pick-up. [Puck Daddy]

Other Shite:

  • Cursing is therapeutic. Coloring curse words is doubly do. Check out this awesome book which features phrases such as "fuck this shit" and "fuck everything."  The perfect gift for the Blues fan in your life. [Bored Panda]
  • Epic or awkward?  You decide. [Distractify]
  • Screw cookies.  (not to be taken literally) Your beer of the day is Strawberry Short's cake. Better than any Christmas cookie out there, this smooth ale with serious strawberry flavor manages to be just sweet enough without being overpowering. And it probably has fewer calories than any cookie worth eating. [Untappd]

Song of the Day:

A song about hope, as a long, shitty December winds to a close. A little premature?  Maybe, but that's how I roll.