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The Blues' record really isn't that good

It may look all shiny in the NHL standings, but they Blues record is actually quite average. So is their play recently.

Gunnarsson futility at work!
Gunnarsson futility at work!
Billy Hurst-USA TODAY Sports

I've never been a fan of NHL records. It's a soft way to display a record. Separating regulation losses from overtime losses like they are unique in their own way. Fuck that. A loss is a loss, whether a point was collected or not.

You see, some misguided Blues fan may look at the NHL standings today and go, "Hey man, it's okay, we are 15-8-4". It's fine, right? No, Tucker, it's not fine. I chose Tucker because Tucker's suck. The name is weak. No boy should be named Tucker. Flynn. Garrett. Todd. Fletcher. They all say this garbage and they suck. They suck like a Michael Buble Christmas song marathon sucks.

No, the record is not okay. It really reads, The Blues are 15-12. Three games above .500. Average. Not good enough. Close to shitty. If you have watched this Blues team play lately, you would agree that something is not right. Maybe it's the terrible Corsi. Maybe it's the painfully slow start. Maybe it's that annoying trend where the defense shuts down completely and allows the opposing offense to fire clear shots on Jake Allen. Maybe it's the fact that the Toronto Maple Leafs walked into Scottrade Center and beat the Blues ass Saturday, 4-1. It could be the fact that the Blues have lost two in a row at home and three all together. Again, disregard the standings where it says "Streak-Lost 1". Bullshit. They've lost three in a row.

The Blues have played like crap for weeks now. Playing down to Columbus, Buffalo, and Toronto. Showing zero pulse or barely scrapping by a team like Winnipeg. Don't tell me it's only early December. Somebody already did that in mid November. What? Is this team's style of play suddenly going to change? Is Magnus Paajarvi pumping the second leading scorer/points collector Alex Steen to the second line going to help? No, it won't. Ken Hitchcock, and his Twinkies stash, will switch the lines up tomorrow night against Arizona when the Blues fall behind 2-0. Just wait.

The Blues record isn't that good folks and it may get worse. They play thirteen more times in December. Nine times at home. The Dallas Stars and their Western Conference leading 93 goals square off against the Blues twice. Nashville has a pair. Minnesota. Colorado. Philadelphia. Does it matter? Right now, the Blues may lose to Reggie Dunlop's band of misfits.

By January 1st, fans will know how good, bad, doomed or reckless this team truly is.

By February 1st, Jaden Schwartz and Patrik Berglund will be back. I hope they like their new coach.