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Monday Links - I'm Running For Parliament

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You get a reprieve from the Postmodern Jukebox to watch a Canadian parliamentary candidate ride a duck before doing a bunch of badass things.

"You . . . SAW . . . the boat anchor I was dragging last year, right Travis? It was wearing 19."
"You . . . SAW . . . the boat anchor I was dragging last year, right Travis? It was wearing 19."
Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports

Hello linkness, my old friend . . .

BLUES NEWS:

  • A few of us looked into who the biggest threat in the Central was to the Blues and why. [SLGT]
  • What defines the Blues? We crowd-sourced to find out. [SLGT]
  • Which promo night are you looking forward to? [SLGT]
  • Steve Ott had a shitty flight. Understandably so. [SLGT]
  • The mask Brian Elliott has lined up for this year is pretty badass. [Frozen Notes]
  • TSN's Travis Yost took a look at highly-paid defensemen and wondered what the fuck was wrong with Alex Pietrangelo last season. Travis, two words: Jay Bouwmeester . . . THAT was wrong. [TSN]
  • Five NHL coaches on the hot seat headed into this season . . . oh hey, check out the picture! Ugh. [Sportsnet]

HOCKEY NEWS:

  • The Bruins claim meals they provide should be tax-deductible, and give a pretty typical Jeremy Jacobs excuse as to why. (S/T to CrossCheckRaise) [Bloomberg BNA Federal Tax Blog]
  • The Patrick Kane story adds a bit of another layer as an off-duty cop (and friend of the star forward) reportedly chauffeured Kane, the victim and two of her friends to Kane's house on the night of the alleged incident. [Buffalo News]
  • Piggybacking off the above piece by Travis Yost, Ryan Lambert looks at right-shot defensemen and whether or not an elite right-shot defenseman is rare in Trending Topics. [Puck Daddy]
  • The Ducks signed recently-acquired RFA forward Carl Hagelin to a four-year $16MM extension. [USA Today]
  • Long-time NHL coach and Hall of Fame player Jacques Lemaire will serve as a special assignment coach with the Leafs this season. [CBS Sports Eye on Hockey]
  • The Penguins handed Sergei Gonchar a professional tryout offer to see if the 41-year-old defenseman has anything left in the tank. [TSN]
  • Pavel Bure is attempting to put together a legends' league in Europe for retired stars. [Sportsnet]

OTHER SHIT:

  • An incredible story of a teenage boy with his own law trouble . . . who helped save a woman from being kidnapped by an ex-boyfriend by buying time to call for help. (S/T to CrossCheckRaise) [CBC]
  • Someone had a little trouble putting together a proper football schedule for the Mizzou football team. #miznoz [Twitter / @Mike_Scherer38]
  • And an Illinois basketball player had a little trouble with the law in France. Yeah, that's not bright. [Deadspin]
  • There's a 26-year-old cat in Oregon. Yikes. [Y! / AP]
  • Ever wonder why games like Solitaire, Hearts, FreeCell and Minesweeper were created for computer systems? Find out. [Mental Floss]
  • Recently, Supernatural star Jensen Ackles found the very first Impala used by him (Dean) and brother Sam Winchester on the show. It . . . was not in great condition. [Nerdist]
  • When you run the Twitter account of a baseball team that gets annihilated, there's really not much for you to do but be sad. [SB Nation / Lookit]

VIDEO:

Want to run for parliament? Make sure your campaign ads are like this, and make sure I become a citizen of Canada and live in your province, and I will vote for you. (S/T to CrossCheckRaise):

Holy shit.

You know how to send us links.

No Beyond Checkerdome this week. Probably next week.