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Vladimir Sobotka: From Russia without love

St. Louis Blues v New Jersey Devils

St. Louis Blues winger Vladimir Sobotka has 35 goals and 88 assists in 381 career NHL games. No one is launching a thousand ships over this player’s future.

Is he returning to the team or not? Sobotka is leading the team and its fanbase on with this offseason circus and I’ve had enough. Cut the rope. Let him go. The preseason is nearly upon the horizon, and this third winger can’t make up his mind. As Paul McCartney sang at Busch Stadium this month, let it be.

Earlier this summer, it was reported Sobe was coming back. Then, the lights dimmed a bit on his return and the road got dark. In early August, he was set to make his return. Last week, it was reported his team in the KHL(let’s not try to pronounce it like we care) made an offer he couldn’t refuse and Sobotka was staying. Or was he? Blues reporter Jeremy Rutherford said it was still undecided and Blues hadn’t heard official word yet. Someone please say battleship.

I think it’s time to fold. Turn your back on the guy. He isn’t going to win you many hockey games. I was a fan of Sobotka back in the day when he scored a hat trick and Blues nation lost their mind. I loved when he pummeled the San Jose Shark after they wrongly opened the Roman Polak door. It was entertaining seeing a midget beat up a shark. As cool as a summer breeze. This ordeal feels the exact opposite.

The Blues could fill Sobotka’s slot with Ty Rattie and not think twice. The 106th overall pick back in 2005 won’t be missed in St. Louis unless you truly count nostalgic mediocrity as a wavering negotiation. I think he can stay overseas. This isn’t about a stay player. It’s about a role player. That’s it. Let’s not confuse Vladimir’s on the St. Louis Blues.

When Sobotka’s agent calls to engage in another game of free agent chess, here is what I would say if I were Doug Armstrong.

“Thanks for the three month bout of jenga but I’ll pass and fill his slot with a younger hungrier and more viable option. Tell Vladimir to stay over there and if he shall return, I’ll trade his sorry ass to the Edmonton Oilers where no one wants to go live the the rest of their NHL days. At one time, your client could have been something special here and played nine minutes a game in esoteric grandeur. Today, he’s a pain in my ass and an ongoing game of to be or not to be. This isn’t Shakespeare. It’s hockey. Goodbye.”

Let Sobotka go people. You’ll feel better tomorrow.