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Wild Vs. Blues Recap: This Won’t Happen Again.

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Narrator: It did. It did happen again.

NHL: Minnesota Wild at St. Louis Blues Jeff Curry-USA TODAY Sports

Blues Lineup:

Jaden Schwartz - Brayden Schenn - Vladimir Tarasenko

Vladimir Sobotka - Paul Stastny - Alexander Steen

Ivan Barbashev - Patrik Berglund - Dmitrij Jaskin

Scottie Upshall - Kyle Brodziak - NBCSN Had Robert Bortuzzo here. Yeah, sure. That’ll go well.

Carl Gunnarsson - Alex Pietrangelo

Jay Bouwmeester - Colton Parayko

Joel Edmundson - Robert Bortuzzo/Vince Dunn

Carter Hutton/Jake Allen

Minnesota Wild Highlights:

The Blues returned home tonight. They took on the Minnesota Wild in an important stretch run against Central Division foes. Jaden Schwartz makes it 1-0 early on after Colton Parayko gets the initial shot on goal. Schwartz stayed with the rebound and jammed it in between starter Devin Dubnyk’s legs. 1-0 Blues on Schwartz’s 16th of the year.

The Wild answered right back just a minute and fifteen seconds later. The Wild’s initial shot hit the post. Carter Hutton did some sort of ballet move and couldn’t stop Nino Niederreiter’s shot. 1-1.

After Colton Parayko had a great scoring chance at one end of the ice...The Wild come back down the ice and score. On another loose puck in front no less. This one was collected and buried by Marcus Foligno to break the 1-1 near the end of the first.

Somehow, the Wild scored another goal before the end of the period. While on the power play, Mikko Koivu glides into the middle of the ice and fires a wicked backhand shot. It was wicked enough that it gave the Wild a 3-1 lead after one.

New period. New goaltender. Same results. (No, this is not me saying it was completely the goaltending.) Jason Zucker made it a 4-1 game on another backhand shot. Not sure why Allen dropped his stick, but he did. Kinda like the Blues had been dropping the ball most of the night. (or puck?)

With a little under four minutes to go in the second, Matt Dumba scored. HOW BAD DOES A GAME HAVE TO BE THAT MATT FREAKIN’ DUMBA SCORED?!?! *ahem sorry. It looked as if Allen had made the save, but the puck trickled in. 5-1 Wild. At this point, the stands had more pride in them.

In the third period, while hoping for a running clock, the Wild scored their second powerplay goal of the night. Eric Staal fired the puck on net that got deflected past Allen and into the back of the net. 6-1 Wild, and all hope is gone at this point.

The Blues scored their token goal that made it look closer thanks in part to Dmitrij Jaskin’s fifth of the year. Also, it’s now 6-2 let’s blare the horn longer than we really probably should at this point.

Paul Stastny almost made it 6-3, but his goal was waived off thanks to a high stick. Your final score Wild 6, Blues 3, everyone that watched the whole game 0. It was a lackluster effort from everyone. (Including me. Sorry.) Shots on goal favored the Blues 37-20. The Blues powerplay went 0 for 3. Wild scored 2 out of 3 on their powerplay.

From the Twitter Machine:

From the “No Shit” department

I feel like the Blues record is god awful on NBCSN but the paper didn’t have that stat. But it has to be below .500

This will just about do it.

Player of the Game:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I want the team from October back.